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Shards of Sanity 「PRIVATE RP」 Phanto feat. Saga


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He lay back down on the table, panting. His voice was surprisingly strong.

 

"A testament to your skill. Has nothing to do with me."

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A faint chuckle escaped him, would be more audible if his throat didn't hurt as heck right now. The man tilted head to scroll tip of tongue near Lou's lips, giving it a second try to kiss the man although the first try ended 'bloody'. One hand reached between Hsin's legs, stroking lazily the sensitive to touch member now and then.

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Hsin jolted and tried buck the man off. He scrambled from beneath the other man and tried to pull his pants up with tired hands.

 

He looked at Harukami with questioning eyes. "When will you let me leave?"

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At least he didn't bite, thought he.

Haru paused his stroking and hand let go as eyes averted to side. When the other would give up on stirring up Haru's chest.

- Aren't you selfish, doctor? - Masato mumbled away as looked back at the man, - You seem no different from others to that aspect. Get what you need, then throw away since of no use. Seems like a human's trail.

 

With hand free to pull the pants completely off, Haru captured one of the legs from under the knee, to bend it against the man's chest,

- But I don't throw away things I like, never did. - it was true, probably one proof was the old book on the table, - I guess, I do like you.

 

Could the other really understand what Haru meant by the confession? Hardly.

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Hsin shoved Harukami's chest. His panic reached the roof. His struggles became almost hysterical. He mumbled incoherent words that even he may not understand.

 

"What are you doing? Masato, don't." He looked up at the man with open eyes that were almost pleading.

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Lou seemed to fear pleasure not, so it was fear purely for Harukami. The long haired man didn't want to hear anything.

Love was acceptance and forgiveness? Bullshit. All his father taught him about belief, and the right path in life never seemed to fall into place for Masato. The male slammed his hand clenched into fist next to Lou's head,

- How much you intend to stir me up until you are satisfied? - truth was, Haru had it tight in pants, frustration and rejection at one place never was a good combination.

 

The man glanced to side, not wanting to see these eyes,

- Very well. So it be. - one to wonder what took place in his mind, - Remove my shirt. - a known order was repeated. If the other didn't want Masato to touch him, then he'd make Lou do it but he was determined, he'd have that man one way or another.

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Hsin gave a determined one word answer. "No".

 

"I.Don't.Want.This. Let me go, Masato." Pause. "Now." His voice was calm and reasonable.

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- You don't get it, - he leaned over the man, the shirt hovering over the bare chest of the other caressed the skin, - I am not asking you. I am telling you to do it.

 

Firm eyes stared down the man, not really planning to back off from what was said.

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Irritation built inside Hsin.

 

"And you don't get it. I'm not informing, I'm confirming." Hsin pushed at his chest once more. "Get of of me."

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The push on chest didn't really bother him or make him back off, Haru grabbed the hands to gather them above Hsin's head. As grip of one hand was rough enough to keep the gathered wrists at place, Masato moved his free hand to force the shirt over Lou's head and use it to tie him up.

- Then I'd help myself.

 

Speaking of which, Lou seemed to be fully undressed by now.

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The knot was too big and tight to be undone. Hsin twisted to the side to try to buck Harukami off, and put his elbows on the table to scramble away.

 

Tears began to fall down his face as his breathing became even faster.

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The table was long, and massive on wood material. Masato watched the other back off, which displeased him but yet excited. It was like chasing after your prey. Arms helped him up on the table, to capture the male by the ankle and tug at him with force. Both knees were on the table surface, so once he pulled Lou towards his body, the man ended up with lower half 'climbed' a bit onto Masato's lap - hands firmly grabbing at Hsin's hips.

- Not so easy, doctor.

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His breathing got faster and faster. Panicking he pried Harukami's bruising hands away from his hips.

 

With tearful eyes, he looked into the other man's eyes, into the man's soul, if he even hadn't one. "Masato, please", he whispered, "Please? I don't want this. Just let me leave."

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The touch that felt so gentle to push away Haru's hands made him ease his eyes, expression though was as determined (maybe even more). The male slid hands down the thighs to spread these long legs, setting each on each side of his torso, he had Lou's hips lifted. It made it easier to have contact with the lower part, but yet not easier to get away from the position.

 

"Please? I don't want this. Just let me leave."

Masato reached his long arm to help the man up and have him sit on Haru's crotch. He caressed the back from downward until he reached the neck and gently grasped it from behind - speaking of possessive pose to take one's first time.

- I can't... - he confessed.

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Hsin shuddered at the other man's words, his body stiffening. "Why? Why can't you?"

 

Hsin was scared to hear Harukami's answer.

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His cheek next to Lou's, the question made him smile though the other couldn't see it.

- You tell me, you are the psychologist between us two. - how he teased.

 

Haru shifted a bit his body, sitting on his ankles wouldn't be smart because that what he was to do would take some time. He thought it's been a good choice to buy that solid and long table instead of the decorative one. Handy, it was. Once he was comfortably holding Lou in arms; one beside Hsin's hip, making its way up to the male's shoulder-blades and the other sneaked down to stroke the other's member.

-A while ago you seemed so eager for my mouth, why are you shuddering now?

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Although through the strands of hair, Haru did place a small kiss against the male's neck's side, mumbling gently something with hand still working around Lou's member.

- ...You don't want any of what?

 

Lazy strokes after strokes, thumb not missing to tease the glans now and then with gently rubbed brushes.

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I want none of you. No matter how long you keep me here. Never.

 

Strong words. Haru thought he was dead from inside for a long time. He thought nothing could reach him, nothing could break anymore. But that crack has he felt it somewhere? That was probably the clarity he always sought, alas..

The word 'never' echoed in Haru's mind, he kept silent then pulled his hand way to pin Lou's body on the table with hands on knees forcing the legs open.

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Shaking uncontrollably, Hsin shook his head.

 

A sob caught in his throat and he bit down on the shirt binding his hands.

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Masato completely shut himself in, it was for the best. If the man didn't want Haru's tenderness, slapping it over and over again - he couldn't much. It wasn't because he was too blind or stupid, but 'force' and 'violence' were the things he had left. The things he only knew so far.

 

Eyes refused to look at the man, so he moved straight to the point. The other didn't seem to calm anytime soon, so getting him excited for now would be a waste of time - or at least Haru didn't want it to be pleasant anymore.

With thumb he rubbed Lou's entrance, silence upon lips though it was scarier when he was so silent.

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He felt the other man's finger at his entrance and his body jolted in surprise and fear.

 

Go away, Hsin. Don't think. Don't be. Just… disappear.

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One leg he had to bent to the man's chest, exposing the bottom more. It would be hard to enter him in this state so whatever could make it easier was welcomed. With a slight brush, he stretched a bit the skin near and around the orifice. It looked so tight; Haru started to wonder if could really make it without tearing the other but as a doctor he knew it already.

 

Long hair covered his face and what he was doing, but body could feel it - the male slid his tongue over the orifice, damping the place until it was teased enough to loosen at the pleasing sensation.

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Eyes squeezes closed, for the right audience, Hsin was a vision. The perfect painting.

 

He mumbled something about heaven having a place just for him, how it's only for him.

 

He suddenly opened his eyes. Black holes.

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