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Shards of Sanity 「PRIVATE RP」 Phanto feat. Saga


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He relaxed his shoulders, not having any intention to do so, but still looked like had something that wanted to correct,

- Doctor. I am such, don't forget that. A friendly advice. As for now... - he shrugged and looked back at the man, -

it was nice to know about your success with other freaks, as you call them. - a slip of tongue, but it didn't matter anymore. He didn't really mean to reveal that he never read the documents Lou requested him to read. It was more thrilling to figure things without 'chosen information' by someone else.

 

And that, that was Shougo's choice in that so called 'stolen' freedom.

- And because you are fair man, I'd be one as well. - a favor returned for the new information, he thought.

- The victims are a precise number, exactly eighty-nine. I wanted them ninety though they said a professional 'caught' me. I suppose that's you. - he chuckled then rocked back off the door to walk to Lou slowly; he didn't mean to panic the man or make him think Shougo switched to some mad intentions.

 

- Let's go to the kitchen. You see, people are so rude when you offer them the truth. - it was meant for the cut on his lip from the guard when Shougo simply told him his wife was cheating on him, but that recall only volume'd his lungs with laughter, - And I haven't had any coffee. I'd like you to make me one, while I tell you about my first unofficial victim. You wanted to feel special, didn't you? I will offer you that once-in-a-life chance.

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Noticing the man's prissy attitude towards his title, Hsin realised that he does care for his station.

 

"My other successful profiles, I never called freaks. Theirs is different from a regular psyche, it is not my concern wether or not their being different is wrong or not. But when this difference is speculated to be a menace, as in all these cases, that's where I come in."

 

As the man approached him, Hsin admittedly felt some alarm. He'd be stupid not to. But the man's movement was slow and careful, as if not to frighten Hsin away. Hsin was somewhat relieved, but still on edge at being in a room with an armed serial killer. He took a half step back, leaving space in between them in case he had to defend himself, or worse, run.

 

"Very well, Dr. Harukami. But I'm afraid I cannot let you out of here with that taser in your hand, so please put it aside. I assure you there will be no repercussions. I am a man of my word."

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Harukami listened to each next word, carefully. As if really interested in the choice of words the other made. And there was indeed a difference how the other spoke now. As if, truly careful not to piss off Shougo. The long haired male placed the taser on the table, but slid it far enough with a push - just like a bartender scroll your drink against the bar. Neither of them were close to the taser - fair enough.

 

- If I wanted to kill you, I'd have done so already. - Harukami stepped back to make some space for Lou to pass without being worried he'd be attacked - Shall we go?

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Hsin felt something fishy about this, but damn, he wanted that information. He knew what the man said wasn't true. He hasn't killed him, that much is obvious, but predictability wasn't his kind's best quality. He looked at the keypad. He knew the code, but since he and Harukami were always let out by Hijikata, he hasn't had the opportunity to use it.

 

With impeccable caution he made his way to the keypad by the door. He covered it with his body.

 

"Avert your eyes."

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A grin spread over lips, he stared at that fine back turned at him. The male was so wiry, as if he got in the cage of the beast. To some aspects it tickled some neurons of Shougo, then again he waited the other to have the sense of danger - but still, it saddened him in an odd way. Harukami reached his hand to grasp Lou by the arm, pulling him in a very smooth gesture backwards - just to have himself "placed" with front before Hsin, his back firmly by the keypad eyes glued to froth.

 

He released the man, his pupils not even moving an itch to assure him that not even a glance would be taken,

- I suppose, this is the safest way to know whether I am watching or not. - he grinned, really enjoying himself.

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The grip on his arm was steely. The movement was too fast for him to pull his arm back like he would've done normally, in disgust. He counted to ten, internally, and took a deep breath. He was the master of his senses, not the man before him. He raised his eyes to Harukami's, making his gaze icy and neutral. The amused expression on the other man's face was understandable, he was playing with him. But God, did he want to slap it off.

 

He then glanced at the keypad, barely visible behind the body in front of him. He saw the machine and cursed internally. Fucking single circuit. The cuts really affected the police force. If he pressed the numbers, the sounds of the buttons beeping are a dead giveaway. His solution was stupid, but he had no other choice.

 

He then thanked whatever deity was up there for his height. His height meant leverage and more importantly a large arm span. Eyes still on the man before him, he reached for the keypad, keeping as much distance between him and Harukami as possible. Before he pressed any button, he began to hum in melodic baritone, loud enough to drown out the sound of the 6 button beeps. 243-647, and the door opened with an audible click.

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The man stepped aside, his amusement still visible but not 'over-abused'. Harukami silently followed the male behind, studying the way the other behaved, walked - each next gesture if there was such.

 

He didn't intent to wait for his coffee, but watch the other make it. Even so, it wasn't to 'breathe in the neck' of Lou, he just felt like a new kind of experiment was before his eyes and each reaction was amusing. Though the other tried his best to manage a perfectly steal expression.

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They walked to the kitchen in silence, Harukami's steps audible behind him. He stiffened his walk, to allowing himself to make any sudden movements, the tension could be cut with a butter knife. When they arrived in the kitchen, Hsin did not wait for the othe man and instantly made his way to the coffee machine. If only he knew how to make coffee. He decided to try his luck with espresso, retrieving two cups and two caches.

 

The machine looked complicated, with buttons and levers that he couldn't make out. He pressed one cautiously, and nothing happened. He then noticed the machine wasn't even plugged in. He plugged it in and began his long coffee making journey. He knew the man was watching him in his coffee making incompetence, but at this point, he didn't care. He, although, never let his frustration with the machine show. As he began to work smoothly, a drop of boiling water caught his hand and he winced. He put the hand to his mouth and cooled it.

 

He picked up the cups when he was finished and set them on the kitchen table, pointing at them with a careless, graceful gesture. Damn, if only he had Zaleplon.

 

 

 

 

 

 

P.S. Zaleplon is a sleep drug

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Shougo calmly followed the gesture, slowly making his way to the kitchen table. If things were different, it'd probably look like a very awkward atmosphere between co-workers or lovers; but anyhow, Harukami placed his elbow on the table, not really paying extra attention if the coffee was stuffed with medication. And probably a few would work on him, the man was a doctor - surrounded by any kind of pain killers and drugs. Not to mention he had a history with so said drugs behind back, not really addiction though. But that was in the dark corners of his past.

 

The long haired man lifted the cup, then paused as if had something to say but yet drank from it - no slurping or sipping sounds did he make. Once he drank and the brim of the cup left his lips, the male spoke,

- Ichinose Mayuuri. However, he was known in Shanghai under the name of Fei Zhang. - a name that was known in the criminal world as a closed case for its oddity but yet many questions were left around the death of that man - like, who actually has done it. Businessmen had many foes, but that man had quite some.

 

- A very neat businessman, he was. - with a glace at the black liquid in cup, he returned eyes to Lou, - Somewhere along the way, I started wondering if he was the beginning or the end. Probably both.

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As he listened to Harukami, he straightened and went straight back to psychiatrist mode. He assessed the excitement on the other man's face, almost like he was reliving the moment. Hsin completely ignored the coffee cup in front of him, only imagining how awful it must have tasted. But hey, he really did his best.

 

His face was as passive as ever as he registered the information in his head, and memorised it instantly. "How old were you when this happened?" He could've probably guessed with Harukami's age and the infamous case from years ago, but he still asked the question.

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Pieces and pieces of that night collided again in his mind, but expression stood unchanged. The man blinked once, averting chin to side to find something to focus on - else the blood pressure of his would raise and that wouldn't be in plus for Lou.

- I suppose at the age of full growing, or so they say - 18 years old.

 

Shougo held the cup gently as if most fragile fragment in this universe, so he knew how to treat things gently - but yet not humans. The man returned to a place in his mind, he rarely did let float.

- However, I am not proud with his death. He could have died way worse, I should have spared him. A few knew who he was in reality.

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"And you knew who he was in reality, I take it?" He nodded.

 

"Could you tell me more about this man, what you knew about him that others didn't? I mean, it's obvious that this murder is different from the others in several ways. Also, a reason, maybe. For killing him."

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His voice became somehow sarcastic, but yet not to give a feeling of irony - just stressing it out.

- Ah, I knew him well. More than enough. After all, - he paused to tear eyes off the kitchen shelves and glance over Lou, - he was my uncle.

 

A plain smile, he followed the curves of the man's suit.

- I suppose it's what they call 'had enough', but for me it was..the plain desire of 'breaking free'. Both are similar, but yet not. You know why, Doctor Lou?

 

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He leaned forward, elbows on the table, chin on intertwined fingers. "Why? What were you breaking away from? Had enough of what?"

 

"And what was it about your uncle that was behind the curtain? Something only you knew?"

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"Why? What were you breaking away from? Had enough of what?"

Seemingly the other didn't quite catch what Harukami meant.

 

- Ah, I suppose 'had enough' doesn't really require sacrifices, but 'breaking free' does so.

 

"And what was it about your uncle that was behind the curtain? Something only you knew?"

 

Shougo grinned and leaned forth to inch closer before the male's face,

- Are you sure you purely ask work-related or for own satisfaction? - after all, Lou didn't have his papers and pen, to make that official.

 

Not really interested in the answer, Harukami moved smoothly his hand forth to capture a strand of Lou's hair as gently as if touching a butterfly,

- You reap what you sow. - Shougo didn't really intent to corner Lou and feel disgusted; he just acted naturally before the man right now. With a slight move back, he retreated hand to grin,

- White Musk Oud? Good choice. - Harukami moved back to his coffee, his eyes glittering with emotions.

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He instantly stiffened when the man touched his hair. It took all his self control not to slap Harukami's hand away. He touched his hair. The bastard touched his hair. His rational mind won the war in the end and he decided to wait until the other man just let the lock go.

 

"If you would please not do that again. Much appreciated. I assure you, all questions are instrumental towards me reaching the wanted solution to this." And to getting the hell out of here, he continued in his head.

 

He cleared his throat. "What did he reap? Or was it you that did the reaping?"

 

Harumaki was right, it was White Musk Oud. And it smelled intoxicating.

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- I see. - the note of voice dropped a bit, he rocked off the table to fix some vase that annoyed his 90-degrees mania and then he continued talking,

- However, that tale is for a person who wishes to know, not to study the case. - Harukami glanced over the kitchen knife set near the sink and then at Lou,

- So, Doctor Lou. Why do you think you still have eyes on? - the question was so out of topic but yet so fitting.

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Hsin sat back in his chair, trying his best not to fidget as he saw where the man's eyes landed. "What if I said I was interested? In that one in particular, since it's different from the others." Hsin softened his voice.

 

"And I still have eyes. Could it be that I am special?"

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The man abandoned the knife moment and walked to Lou, slowly passing by to find the upper half of his body pressed against the man's back; each of the hands set on each side of Hsin, not really forcing him to bend or anything - but still alarming for hovering over him from behind.

- Please, we both know you don't really care how the tale went. You need results, not the process.

 

He sighed a faint chuckled into the male's neck as leaned more to have his chin on Lou's shoulder,

- Special. I like how it sounds. You must be special, indeed. In fact, I will make you even more special.

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Hsin swallowed and closed his eyes to concentrate on taking deep breaths, muscles tensing under the other man's touch. He can't have him this close. He pushed his chest against the kitchen table and its legs screeched against the floor as he pushed it to get farther from the man behind him.

 

He cleared his throat and his voice was surprisingly calm as it came out. "The others are of no interest to me personally. This one as you have said is different. The anomalies interest me. Having results from this one is just a bonus." The man's breath was hot on his neck.

 

The man's chin rested on his shoulder, and Hsin jumped ever so slightly. Too much, this was too much. Harukami's words were also alarming-almost frightening, as Hsin's breaths began to become deeper and deeper. Keep your cool, Hsin. He looked around unnoticeably. Where the fuck was that stun gun?

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Track used for muse: ||

 

He grinned; it wasn't the first time he felt a body warmth, but for first time he really enjoyed it. A doctor could always notice the change of behavior, not to mention the breathing. One of the most important process a doctor kept eyes on.

 

He brushed all the words Hsin said,

- Something's wrong, Lou? - Shougo sharpened his eyes as hand smoothly rose from the table to crawl smoothly up the male's neck; he tenderly placed his palm against Lou's hidden smoothness under the chin to tilt the head gently against his own chest - You wanted details how I killed them?

 

His thumb gently rubbed against Hsin's Adam Apple, easing the sharpness of his cold gaze he followed the curves of the man's velvet lips,

- I broke them, mentally. All of these strong minded and successful men, I broke them down. You see, success is always a sign of a coming 'downfall'; so I wanted to be that downfall. And once they crawled in my feet, before they could lose the flame in their eyes ... - he closed even more to stare at Lou's eyes from a very short distance - I took them out.

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As the man tilted his head back, he tried to resist, but Harikami was having none of it. Hsin pushed against his hand until he was in a position to push no more. And so he looked up at the man that held him. The man's expression had changed. He was still smiling but his eyes took a turn towards something much more sinister. Like the darkness took over, the alter ego, if you will. This was the real Harukami, the murderer.

 

"Nothing wrong, Harumaki. But you really shouldn't be touching me." Especially not like that. A hand is one think, the neck another. He could snap it if he so wished.

 

Harukami's thumb on his apple tickled a bit, but laughing was the last thing on his mind. He licked his lips quickly and cleared his throat. Hsin asked hesitantly as he stared right back at the other man's eyes and felt a strange calm come over him, "How did you break them?"

 

His vision then blurred slightly as his eyes began to wet. Fucking timing.

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He sank in these beautiful eyes for a brief moment, but went back to reality with the lingering question of Lou.

 

How did you break them?

 

A discontent click of tongue he released the man as stepped back to get his elbows on the table, standing shoulder by shoulder with Hsin.

- I thought we had a moment. - joked he, but then continued - I lack empathy Lou, but that's good because I don't pity. I lack love, too. But that's good because I don't hate. - he glanced over Hsin for a pause.

.

.

.

- My endearing Lou, humans are truly disgusting once they start to feel. - he chuckled and leaned to side, once again close a breath away from Hsin - You disgust me, but that's what makes you special. You make me feel.

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Any other time, any other person, that might have hurt. But Hsin's mixed feelings were anything but hurt. He was fascinated for one. What was it about him that made Harukami feel? And what exactly did he feel? Did he blame Hsin? Hsin was a brilliant psychiatrist, not a fortune teller.

 

He scooted back in his chair to keep some distance between them. He was getting answers, but at what price?

 

You don't ask, you don't get. So he asked, "Feel what exactly? And at what?" He wiped the not-yet-fallen tears with finesse.

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For a clever mind Lou really could be considered as dense, or so Shougo thought. The man averted his eyes silent for the question. Probably he himself couldn't really tell what he felt, it wasn't everyday for him to feel whatever it was. So the male just supposed.

 

- You are surely mean, Dr. Lou. - a pretty bitter smile escaped him. Probably that was how all women Hsin hurt felt - abandoned and lonely.

 

- But say, didn't you ask quite some things already? - he grinned as pulled away from the table, - I suppose now is my turn.

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