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brohne
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ahhh so cool, i really look forward to this each day after i come home from wrk, iv already read the whole lot twice :D its totally swept me away and i can just see all the characters in my head n the situations etc, man does this make me smile ^_^

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ahhh so cool, i really look forward to this each day after i come home from wrk, iv already read the whole lot twice :D its totally swept me away and i can just see all the characters in my head n the situations etc, man does this make me smile ^_^

 

thank you so much, I'm thrilled that I can write something that you enjoy

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Kenta

 

I’d herded Hasu and Akira off to the living room while Ryuu and Sora argued. Practice was running a lot longer than normal tonight. Reiko had went home two hours ago and they were still practicing. Actually, now they were arguing. It was rare that the two of them got into a fight like this. Neither one was giving an inch either. I shut the door to the studio behind me so the two younger boys couldn’t hear the yelling.

 

“You can’t do this Ryuu! They both have school tomorrow. Akira is going cross eyed with fatigue and Hasu is barely able to keep in rhythm. They are exhausted Ryuu.”

 

“Do you not realize that we have back to back concerts this weekend? We have to be ready. Akira keeps mixing up the third and fifth bars on Infatuation and Hasu’s timing is completely off for Cry. We need more practice.”

 

“We can practice tomorrow Ryuu. They are too tired and the mistakes are only going to get worse.”

 

“Fine, maybe I should just cancel the concerts and we’ll just be out the money.”

 

“Ryuu stop being so fucking unreasonable!”

 

“I’m not being unreasonable. This is important! We have to get this right. We’ll take a break and get snacks and then we can-“

 

“Stop acting like a spoiled brat always having to have your way!” Sora was in Ryuu’s face now and I stepped forward not sure if I should break them up yet or not. “You need to think about your friends first not the band!”

 

“You’re just mad because you wanted to spend tonight at Hasu’s playing around instead of practicing.”

 

Sora’s eyes narrowed and I went to reach for him but he was already stepping back. “Not like you wouldn’t rather be here alone with Kenta.”

 

I was surprised at the bite in Sora’s words and didn’t much care for being thrown into the conversation.

 

“Well at least I’m not a pedophile.”

 

I heard Sora gasp and make a small pained sound. I stared at Ryuu absolutely fucking floored that he would say something like that to Sora. I knew he teased Sora about their age difference, but that was going too far. I’d never seen Sora look so hurt and I wasn’t sure if he was going to hit Ryuu or cry.

 

“Ryuu!” I grabbed his arm shaking him slightly. “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

 

I jumped as the door slammed behind me. Pulling Ryuu close I grabbed his head making him look at me. He wouldn’t meet my eyes, pulling away from me.

 

“Fuck it.” Shoving him back I stalked out the door. I had to find Sora. If things ended this way tonight there would be no concert to worry about practicing for. What the fuck had gotten into Ryuu anyway, saying shit like that. I saw how Sora was with Hasu. It was easy to tell the big guy was head over heels for the little drummer, but he’d never once even done so much as touch the boy. If anything, Hasu was the one who was all over Sora, but he was just affectionate and liked to wrestle. Hell, he did the same with me. Crazy little kid though it was funny to tackle me and try to pin me.

 

I glanced into the living room but no Sora. Akira was already asleep on the couch and Hasu was curled up on one of the big pillows in the floor. I couldn’t tell but he was probably asleep too. He wasn’t moving so that was a pretty good clue; there were also three empty boxes of cookies near him. I glanced over at the clock. Well shit. It was two in the fucking morning. No wonder Sora was so pissed. Ryuu didn’t usually get this demanding about them practicing. Both the songs he mentioned could just be cut from the set list. It was an hour and a half set list anyway. It wouldn’t hurt to shorten it a bit anyway.

 

“Sora?”

 

He was standing in the kitchen with the lights off. I’d almost missed seeing him. I slowly walked up to him.

 

“Sora . . . I’m sure he didn’t mean it.”

 

There was a heavy sigh and the broad shoulders slumped. “I’m going home. Maybe . . . maybe tomorrow he’ll have gotten his head out of his ass.”

 

Heading back into the studio I found Ryuu putting away instruments. Maybe he’d come to his senses.

 

“Sora left.”

 

“So.”

 

“What the fuck is your problem?”

 

“My problem is I have lazy band mates who would rather play around than actually practice.”

 

Walking over to him I grabbed his arm, yanking him around to face me. There was a flat, hostile look in his eyes that surprised me.

 

“Stop it Ryuu. I know this band is important, but you are being stupid. ”

 

“I’m being stupid?” He jerked his arm out of my grip and shoved me back. I was shocked. He’d never once been aggressive with me or anyone else. Not that I’d ever seen. “I’m being stupid? How is caring about whether or not we provide a good performance for our fans stupid?”

 

“You guys will be fine. Just drop the two songs you guys are having trouble with and shorten the set. Pushing everyone this hard is just going to make them upset. You didn’t have to say shit like that to Sora either.” I could tell he was exhausted, his determination and sheer stubbornness was all keeping him going at this point. “Go to bed Ryuu.”

 

“Shut up Kenta. I’ll do whatever I damn well please.”

 

I narrowed my eyes at him. “Just like fucking normal then. I’ll be back when you decide that you want to actually be fucking reasonable.”

 

“Why don’t you come back when you quit sounding like some two bit thug from a yakuza movie?”

 

I could tell as soon as the words left his lips that he regretted it. His eyes widened, his face paling. “Ke-Kenta, I didn’t-“

 

“Shut the fuck up Ito.” I shook off his hand as he reached for me. “You made your fucking point.”

 

He let out a low sob and shoved by me flinging the door open so hard it banged off the wall. I let him go. It bothered me just how much his comment hurt. He’d never said shit like that to me before. Actually, this was the first time I could remember him acting like this at all. He could be childish and silly, but he was never mean. This was a totally different side to him and I wondered why he was suddenly acting like this.

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Ryuu

 

I lay on my bed my face buried into my pillow. It was still wet with tears but I’d managed to stop crying. Though every time I thought about what I’d said to Kenta, new tears would well up. Why was I so stupid? Now everyone was mad at me, Kenta, Sora, Reiko would be too when she found out how late I’d kept everyone up tonight. I was just so worried. Worried and upset, but that didn’t mean I had to take it out on everyone else.

 

I felt the bed move and heard Kenta sigh. “Ryuu . . .you need to call Sora and at least say you are sorry.”

I turned my head so that I was facing away from Kenta. How could I look at him right now? Why was he even bothering to talk to me? I didn’t deserve to have him in my life. Didn’t deserve to have any of this. I bit my lip to keep the sob in as a warm hand stroked my hair. Jerking away I sat up moving to the other side of the bed.

 

“Stop it. Just stop. Why are you so nice to me?”

 

Silence.

 

“I found the article, Ryuu.”

 

I sucked in a startled breath and turned to face him almost scared of what I would see. He held up the magazine before tossing it on the bed. It was open to the page and I flinched looking away. The photo of me was from earlier this year when I’d went to visit my mother in Europe for a week. “I thought I’d thrown it away.”

 

“It was laying on your desk. Is this why you are acting so fucking weird today?”

 

I hung my head, not able to answer him.

 

“Ryuu!” He sighed and I could hear the exasperation in his voice. “You let this kind of shit get to you? Come on! You are smarter than that!”

 

“Did you read it?”

 

Another sigh and I heard the crinkle of pages as he picked the tabloid up. “Ito Ryuunosuke is known for many things, being socially responsible is not one of them. The heir to the Ito fortune was seen out with his bodyguard in Shinnomiya earlier this week. As usual he spent money like there was no tomorrow only stopping at the most expensive shops the area has to offer. No you didn’t, stupid fuckers. Besides we weren’t in Shinnomiya. Can’t even get that right. Fucking idiots.”

 

He paused for a moment. “This is the part I don’t get . . . Ito’s band Bloody Agony has risen quite well in the charts for being a visual kei style band. There are rumors that the band’s popularity has nothing to do with the actual music and more to do with Ito’s antics and playboy status. Another rumor states that Ito has paid certain industry leaders to achieve their current ranking. Is that why you’ve been pushing the practices so hard? You don’t really think people believe this shit do you? Ryuu?”

 

I shrugged not turning to look at him. What if it was true? What if that was the only reason people came to the concerts and bought the CDs? I worked so hard on the music and had even taken composition and music theory classes to improve and still people said shit like this. Though the part about me paying bribes really pissed me off. Where the hell did they get that idea anyway? True I used my parents money to help the band, but only when it came to buying equipment or outfits. I would never use my money or influence to try to make things easier or get us ahead.

 

“Ryuu . . . these people obviously have never heard your music. I know how much time and effort you put into the songs. That is the reason you guys are even on the charts. This is all just bull shit. Fucking bull shit.”

 

I sighed. “I know Kenta . . . but it still bothers me. I’ve had to fight people thinking I’m nothing but a stupid stuck up selfish brat for so long, I’m just tired of it. Why can’t they just judge the band on our music, why does it have to be about me?”

 

“Sorry Ryuu. But honestly today you acted just like a selfish brat and treated your friends like shit.”

 

I lowered my head. It was suddenly hard to breath, a hot ache in my chest. I could barely get the words out. “I know. I know . . .”

 

“Fuck. Don’t start crying Ryuu.”

 

“I’m sorry!” I wiped furiously at the tears that were falling. “I just want this weekend to go well. There are going to be reporters there from several big music magazines and I’m terrified we’ll get a bad review.”

 

I gasped holding my cheek, the sting from the slap shocking me. I stared up at Kenta only to see him glaring at me.

 

“You should be more worried about your friends. You are so concerned about the band but seem to forget that the band is made up of your friends.”

 

I was shaking unable to tear my eyes away from him. He was right. Oh shit, why was I so stupid? I’d completely let that inane article get to me and I’d hurt the very people I should have turned to for support instead. I couldn’t stop the tears any longer, the sobs wracking my body. The next thing I knew I was being gathered up into strong arms.

 

“Ryuu . . . come on . . . this is not like you. Why did that article upset you so much?”

 

Kenta

 

I felt like shit. I shouldn’t have hit him. He was too fragile right now and I’d only made things worse instead of getting my point across. Fuck. He was sobbing so hard I was afraid he was going to pass out from not getting enough air. I rubbed his back trying to get him calmed down. The sobs slowly quieted down until they were just random hiccups. I knew the article was harsh but it wasn’t as bad as some other’s I’d seen that bashed certain celebrities. He finally loosened his grip on my shirt.

 

“It wasn’t just that article. There are lots more like it. The tabloids in Europe are even worse.” He leaned away from me grabbing a tissue and wiping his face. “They call the band a fake and say that I probably lip synch to someone else’s singing. They’ve attacked all the members of the band at various points. Father is suing one of the papers because what they said was so slanderous.”

 

What the hell? No wonder he was so upset. “Well then how do they explain when you screw up? Or what happened that time you almost passed out because you were sick and too stubborn to cancel. That stuff can’t be faked.”

 

“I know, but it’s hard not to be hurt by it.”

 

I kissed his temple. “You are just too thin skinned Ryuu. You’ll never survive in this business if you don’t toughen up a bit.”

 

“I know. Mother said the same. She said she had to deal with all kinds of tabloid rumors when she was a top model. People can be very unkind.”

 

“They can be worse than that. Come on you are exhausted. Let’s go to bed.”

 

“Actually . . . I think I’ll call Sora first.”

 

I nodded and let him up. I had been hoping he was going to say that. While he was on the phone I went to go check on the boys. Akira had apparently fallen off the couch and Hasu had rolled under the coffee table. Sighing I picked up Akira first since I knew he wouldn’t wake up. Damn but the boy was light. I put him in the spare bedroom and went back for Hasu. I finally just picked up the coffee table and moved it. He was a bit heavier than Akira even though they were the same height.

 

“Hey! What are you doing? Put me down.”

 

“Shh! I’m just taking you to bed.”

 

“I can walk you know.”

 

“We are already here.” I set him on the bed and tousled the dark hair. “Get some sleep.”

 

He was already burrowing under the covers next to Akira. Looking at the two of them for a moment I frowned. I knew Ryuu wasn’t intentionally doing it, but he was being too hard on them. Akira’s fingers were raw and Hasu had blisters in his hands. Neither of them had complained though.

 

“Hey Kenta?”

 

I turned back to look at Hasu. He was sitting up in the bed looking at me. The light from the hallway was glowing in his eyes, making them seem even larger than normal. He looked like such a little kid even if he was almost seventeen.

 

“Is Ryuu still mad at us?”

 

“What?”

 

“It’s just . . . he’s been so short with everyone today and I know I’m having a hard time with Cry, but he’s never been this frustrated before.”

 

“It doesn’t have anything to do with you, Hasu.” Walking back over to the bed I tucked the covers around him and then Akira. “Just go to sleep. I’ll get you guys up in time for school.”

 

“Thanks Kenta . . . you’re really nice no matter what anyone says.”

 

I chuckled at the sleepy voice and patted his head. “You’ll learn better.”

 

Turning out the hallway light I went to find Ryuu. He was curled up in the office chair, the phone laying open on the desk. Going over, I shut it and touched his shoulder. He slowly raised his head to look at me a small, pained smile on his lips.

 

“I talked to Sora.”

 

“And.”

 

“He’s still mad at me, but . . . he said he’d be over in the morning.”

 

“It is morning.”

 

“Well . . . around noon anyway.”

 

I shook my head letting out a slow breath. Reaching down I pulled him to his feet. There was no resistance, in fact he was limp and for a second I wondered if I was going to end up carrying everyone to bed. He suddenly threw his arms around me, nuzzling his face against my neck.

 

“I’m really sorry about today Kenta. I didn’t mean to say that stuff.”

 

“It’s done and over Ryuu, just forget about it. Next time shit like this comes up, just say something instead of driving everyone crazy.”

 

“I will. I’m sorry. Umm . . . I think I’m going to cancel the concert tomorrow night.”

 

Grabbing his shoulders I pulled him back so I could look at him. “No, you aren’t. You will talk to your friends first and see what they want to do. It’s their band too Ryuu. Not just yours.”

 

“I just thought that-“

 

“No. Hasu already thinks you are mad at him. If you cancel now it will look like you don’t have any confidence in their skill. No. You will not cancel the concert.”

 

He looked at me for a moment, the soft grey eyes seeming to pull me deeper and deeper in.

 

“This is why I love you so much Kenta.” He leaned in and kissed me, a soft sweet kiss that left me with a warm tingling sensation. “Let’s go to bed. We’ve got a lot to do in the morning.”

 

“We? What we?”

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Kenta

 

I woke to the feel of a warm hand sliding up my hip.

 

“Ryuu . . . I’m sleeping.”

 

“Not anymore.” I jerked my head away as he nibbled on my ear. “It’s almost two. I let you sleep in.”

 

“Fuck! Why didn’t you get me up sooner?”

 

“You looked so cute, I didn’t have the heart to wake you. And now I’ve got new wallpaper for my phone.”

 

“Ito!”

 

He squeaked and leapt out of the bed as I went to grab him.

 

“Get back here!”

 

I managed to grab his wrist and yanked him back down on the bed. His laughter made me smile as I pinned him. He was trying to wiggle out from under me, but I wasn’t having that. He looked too damn good to leave alone. His hair was done up in a simple ponytail, strands that had slipped free were laying across his cheek and forehead and even without his usual make-up he looked down right fucking hot. Keeping a tight hold on his wrist I grabbed his other arm so he couldn’t get loose. Leaning down I looked into those stunning grey eyes.

 

“You are in big trouble now.”

 

The eyes widened slightly, but I didn’t miss the way one corner of his mouth twitched. “Oh really?”

 

He shifted slightly under me and I felt his leg wrap around mine. He suddenly pushed up and twisted at the same time. My back hit the bed the next instant. I stared up at him for a moment.

 

“Fuck. When did you learn to do that?”

 

He laughed and kissed me, a soft slightly moist press of lips against mine. “I’ve known how to do that for a couple of years now. Hasu showed me how. ”

 

“Oh.”

 

“You are really cute when you pout.”

 

“Ain’t pouting.”

 

“You are too. You don’t like it that I can pin you.” This seemed to be way too fucking funny to him.

 

“Never said that.”

 

“You don’t have to say it, your eyes give you away.” He laughed softly and slid back so that he was straddling my hips. I had to bite my lip as the sudden friction sent a rush of heat through me.

 

“Oh, you liked that didn’t you.”

 

“F-fuck! Don’t do that Ryuu.” I gasped as he ground his hips against mine. “I need to get up.”

 

“Oh I’ll get you up, don’t worry.”

 

“Ry-shit!” I gasped as he moved just right, my eyes squeezing shut for a moment. He was right about that. He didn’t really have to do anything at all to get me hard was the problem. I tried to get my arms out of his grip, but he was a lot stronger than he looked. He was grinning as he continued to move against me. He leaned down so that our faces were close.

 

“I know this won’t get you off, but we can finish that in the shower.”

 

I wasn’t quite sure what to think and honestly I didn’t care. He suddenly pulled back, pulling me up with him. “Come on lets go.”

 

“Wait . . .right now?”

 

“Well yeah.”

 

“Wait! Wait! Ryuu! Aren’t the guys here?”

 

“Kenta I have soundproofed walls and I locked the door so don’t worry about it.” That grin was going to kill me one of these days. I didn’t have much choice as he dragged me into the bathroom. I never thought anyone could strip so fast. I hadn’t even got my shirt over my head when I felt hands on my hips. I sucked in a startled breath as teeth lightly grazed a nipple. I jerked, my arms getting caught in my shirt. It was like an electric shock had just shot straight to my cock.

 

“Fuck! Ryuu!”

 

His soft laugh was quickly followed by another assault on my exposed nipples. I finished yanking the shirt free and went to grab him. He slid out of my grasp taking my shirt with him. That was when I realized my pants were around my ankles. Well shit. Stepping out of them, I went to grab him again. Sneaky little shit. He didn’t try to avoid me this time. Instead he stepped close, fingers latching on to my hips to pull me flush against him. I had to bite back a groan at the feel of him pressed up against me like this. Warm soft lips found mine and I was rather shocked when a tongue followed. That was new. New and very nice. Very nice. Sliding my hands down his back, I cupped that perfect ass and heard him moan softly. I shuddered as one of his hands slid down between us to slowly start stroking me.

 

“Ryuu, we don’t have time . . . the concert . . .”

 

He pulled back to look at me, perfectly arched eyebrows raised. “You are really going to make me stop?”

I glanced toward the shower. I was going to blue ball myself doing this but Ryuu was my first concern. This concert was very important. Wasn’t it just yesterday that he’d been willing to alienate his friends in order to get things perfect? Sometimes I really did not understand what went through the man’s head. “Wait till after the concert. I don’t want you tired.”

 

“Oh . . .” Something in his eyes changed slightly and he looked down. After a moment he looked back up at me through his hair and I seriously questioned if I wasn’t crazy. Who the hell would make him stop? I was fucking nuts! No one should be able to look so innocent and so fucking seductive at the same fucking time.

 

“So . . . you have plans for after the concert?”

 

“Guess you could say that.” Didn’t have a fucking clue what they were at this point, but they involved making one Ito Ryuunosuke scream my name. Fuck. Shouldn’t think about that. “Maybe we’ll actually use those condoms.”

 

His eyes widened as his head jerked up. He stared at me for a long moment before grinning and hugging me close. “Are you sure? You said –“

 

“Yeah, I’m sure. Just go get ready and let me take my fucking shower.” I leaned against the counter behind me watching as he quickly got dressed and with one last smile at me left the room. I was still hard as a fucking rock. Fuck . . .had I really just promised what I thought I had? Oh fuck.

 

That conversation had been fucking awkward. I’d tried to explain that I wasn’t quite ready to go that far. He’d pouted for a couple days after that. Couldn’t exactly come out and say ‘Sorry Ryuu I’m not ready to fuck you like you want cause I saw what happened to the guys in juvie and it scared the shit out of me.’ Besides that . . . I wasn’t ready for going that far just yet. Ryuu was too . . . he deserved better. As corny as it sounded I wanted it to be special not just a quick fuck.

 

And I’d just screwed myself out of what would have been an amazing blowjob. Such a fucking idiot. But at least Ryuu had something to look forward to.

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Ryuu

 

I could barely sit still backstage. I knew my excitement had little to do with the upcoming concert. I’d resigned myself to waiting until Kenta was ready. He’d been really sweet about it, but very firm. I wasn’t about to push something on him that he didn’t want to do. I’d made it this far with him and I wasn’t going to ruin it by going too fast.

 

“You are getting as bad as Hasu. What’s wrong with you?” Sora chuckled softly as he tuned his guitar.

 

“Oh um . . . just excited.”

 

“Well you might want to calm down and do your warm up.”

 

“Oh yeah.” I was letting this get too me way too much. I needed to calm down or the concert was going to suffer. Kenta would be there after the concert. Oh god . . . I needed to calm down.

 

“You need an icepack or something for that?” Sora raised an eyebrow at me and I glared shifting away from him. Now that was just embarrassing and I was glad Hasu and Akira were still getting the drums set up.

 

“Actually . . . that might not be a bad idea.”

 

“That bad huh?”

 

“He finally said yes.”

 

“No fucking way. No wonder you are-“

 

“Just shut up. I’ll be right back.”

 

His laughter followed me out. I needed to get cooled down and there was no way I could take care of my problem right now. For one thing I was not unlacing these pants again. They took entirely too long to get back on. Okay, walking was starting to hurt. I needed to think of something besides Kenta, like how upset the fans would be if I couldn’t sing tonight.

 

It took about ten minutes but I finally was able to come back and get warmed up. I just had to keep my mind focused on the concert and singing. By the time we were ready to go onstage I had everything under control.

The heat from the lights and the sound from the crowd seem to hit me with physical force and I grinned. This was what I loved, to be able to entertain and enjoy the reaction of the crowd. It was like a live thing, the way the sound would wrap around me. By the first intermission I was completely into it. While the other guys went backstage to grab drinks, I stayed on stage and talked to the crowd. This was one of my favorite things to do. It was so much fun to watch them. The girls up front were screaming and yelling things at me, but when I’d talk they would calm down to listen. It was so cute. So I told them so and the noise got nearly deafening. I was grinning as I walked back toward the center of the stage. Akira had just come back and was smiling at me.

 

I went to grab my own water as Hasu took his seat and rattled off a quick little set that had the girls screaming again. This was the only time he’d talk to the crowd and they went nuts for him. I had to admit, he was absolutely adorable.

 

Soon it was time to start up again and I walked back to center stage. After announcing the next couple of songs I turned to Hasu smiling. I knew Cry was hard for him with the constantly changing tempo, but he could do it. He nodded and after the guitar intro went right into playing. I grinned as he hit the timing perfectly and nodding my head to the beat walked closer to the edge. This song was a little different than the others and I like to get close and personal with the fans when I sang it. There was a short catwalk, only about four feet long by that wide in the front center of the stage which was perfect for this. It didn’t have the barrier around it like the rest of the stage.

 

I’d just finished the refrain and was getting ready to turn to grab a drink during the guitar solo when I felt something catch my ankle. I went to step back to regain my footing only to realize too late that I’d stepped off the side of the catwalk.

 

Kenta

 

I was already sprinting down the narrow divider between the fans and the stage. I still couldn’t see Ryuu and Akira had quit playing and was at the edge of the stage. I could see Hayate and Hiro and another security guard headed for the spot Ryuu had disappeared. Fuck it all to hell.

 

A blond head suddenly popped back up and then he was climbing back onto the stage, waving at the crowd and laughing. Holy fucking shit. I thought I was going to be sick my heart was beating so fast. Slowing down I met Hayate in front of the stage. I was not moving from this spot the rest of the night. Hell I’d probably stand here for every concert from now on. Seeing him fall had rattled me like nothing else. He could have so easily broken something or been knocked unconscious. Thankfully the rest of the concert went by without any further incidents except Ryuu’s normal antics. Though my ears were ringing and I could barely hear. Ear plugs next time.

 

Backstage the boys were doing their usual routine. Akira was stretched out on the couch his feet up on the arm rest. Sora was helping Hasu open the gift baskets we regularly got at the concerts now. Ryuu was . . . not here.

 

“Where’s Ito?”

 

“He went to go change, he said his pants were bothering him.”

 

“Really . . . “ He loved those pants but I wouldn’t let him wear them in public. It was bad enough that he wore them on stage in front of thousands of screaming girls. Before I could go look for him he was back in jeans and a t-shirt and looking sexier than ever. He’d taken his hair down and washed most of the make-up off. He couldn’t possibly have looked any more gorgeous. I stumbled slightly as someone shoved me and turned to see Sora grinning down at me.

 

“You might want to close your mouth, you are drooling.”

 

I glared up at him and as soon as he turned away wiped a hand across my mouth just to be sure. Ryuu was already walking over and I was a little startled when he grabbed my arm and dragged me out of them room. Sora’s laughter following us out the door.

 

“Ryuu . . . Ryuu where are we going?”

 

He’d led us down a couple of hallways and we were now at one of the back stairwells that lead outside. “Here this is good. I just need a few minutes.”

 

“Wha-“ Anything else I was going to say was swallowed up by his lips on mine. My back hit the wall behind me and I wondered if he was going to let me fucking breathe. If I’d thought his kisses were amazing before this seemed to be on a whole new level. Did concerts making him fucking horny or what? He’d never been this aggressive before. Whatever it was I didn’t care but I couldn’t let him undress me here like it seemed like he was trying to do, his hands sliding up under my shirt. I somehow managed to grab his arms, pulling his hands out from under my shirt.

 

“Ry-Ryuu . . . wa-wait . . . “ I could barely get a word out between kisses and was getting light headed from lack of air.

 

He finally pulled back and I found myself gasping for air. Holy fucking hell. The look in his eyes should have been fucking illegal or something. Soft fingers slid down my cheek and I wondered when I’d let go of him.

 

“Thank you.”

 

“Huh?”

 

“Thank you for being there and trying to protect me. I saw you in front of the stage.”

 

“Oh.” That? That was what this was about? I started to say I was just doing my fucking job, but the look in his eyes stopped me. Shit. Why did he have to be so pretty? Pretty, talented and all around amazing if you didn’t mind dealing with a few temper tantrums and the occasional crying. I didn’t mind it in the least. “Yer welcome.”

 

I barely got it out before he was kissing me again.

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Ryuu

 

I could barely keep from pouncing Kenta on the ride home. I was dying to know what he had planned but he was his usual quiet, imperturbable self. Though it was cute to see him touch his neck every so often where I’d given him that hickey. I loved being able to break down that stern façade and make him go crazy. Speaking of . . . sliding my hand up his leg I leaned over against him. He twitched slightly and didn’t look at me. I couldn’t help but smile.

 

“What are you thinking about?”

 

Dark eyes flicked toward me then away. “Nuthin.”

 

I didn’t believe that for a second. It irritated me that people just assumed Kenta was stupid because of the way he talked. Shaking off that thought, I reached up to brush his hair back from his face. I loved the way his hair would feather around his face, almost making him look boyish. He looked a lot softer than he really was. It had caught quite a few people off guard. That and his glare could eat through concrete. He must practice or something. Kenta had the ‘I’ll fuck you up so bad you’ll wish I killed you’ look. Which was kind of funny considering the man was pretty enough to put most idols to shame. I couldn’t help staring at him.

 

I still remembered the first time I’d seen him. Really seen him. I’d seen him at Hayate’s bar before then, but I’d been too focused on Akira at the time. Akira had asked me and Sora to come to the hospital to visit a friend who was a fan. I’d jumped at the chance. I loved meeting fans. Though not quite the way I’d done it tonight. Thankfully that girl hadn’t been hurt when I’d fallen on her. She’d seemed more delighted than anything. I hadn’t known that the friend Akira was talking about was Kenta. He’d been assaulted and beaten unconscious by a group of boys with pipes. His injuries had been pretty severe, though I hadn’t been aware of it at the time. I don’t think I could ever forget seeing him sitting up in the bed. He’d been heavily bandaged, but it had still been easy to see that he was exceptionally good looking. His eyes had been the first thing to enthrall me. I’d never met anyone with eyes so deep that they pulled you in and held you captivated. There had been pain there, but also a determination that was unlike anything I’d ever seen.

 

Akira had explained what had happened and I’d been shocked that anyone would go that far to help a friend. He’d been teaching Reiko to defend herself and had run into the very boys who had been harassing her. Six on one is never good odds, even with someone as skilled as Kenta. He didn’t know a formal style like Hasu, but he had years of street experience on his side. He’d been so happy to meet us and I had ended up staying after everyone left. We’d talked for hours. Well, I’d talked as he laid there listening, those inscrutable dark eyes never looking away. Before I’d left I’d asked if it would be alright if I came back the next day. That had been the first time I had ever seen him smile.

 

Looking at him now, knowing him as well as I did, I knew it had to have been meant for us to meet. I needed him. Needed his calming quiet presence just like he needed me to see past the tough exterior to what he really was. I followed him out of the limo, keeping close to him. He had a hand on my elbow which was normal, but for some reason it felt different. The way his fingers curled around the inside of my arm, his grip firm yet gentle, was sending tingles racing over my skin. How could a simple touch do this to me? Naoki had never made me feel this way even when we’d first got together. I’d never had this nearly breathless anticipation, the sensation that I was jumping out of my own skin. I wasn’t going to hold back once we got to the apartment. I wanted him like I’d never wanted anyone in my life. Wanted to lose myself utterly and completely to this man I’d fallen for.

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Kenta

 

I barely had a chance to get my shoes off before Ryuu was dragging me through the apartment. I didn’t want to admit it but I was fucking nervous like I’d never been before in my life. Even when I’d been waiting to hear my sentence read at court I hadn’t been this nervous. I was shaking, bad enough that I didn’t like it, that weird slightly weak feeling. Before I realized it we were in the bedroom. He hadn’t bothered to turn the lights on and in the dim light from the windows I could make out him stripping.

 

“I’m going to go take a quick shower. You are free to join me if you want.”

 

The shaking was getting worse. Maybe . . . maybe doing just that would be for the best. I could get him off and maybe he would forget what I’d said. Yeah right, what the fuck was I thinking? Once Ryuu got an idea in his head you better just get out of his fucking way. Slowly getting undressed I followed him into the bathroom. Slipping into the shower behind him I noticed the bruise on his side.

 

“Fuck! Ryuu, you got hurt when you fell!”

 

“Oh, yeah it’s a little sore but nothing like when you broke your ribs I’m sure.”

 

“I didn’t break them the guy with the baseball bat broke them.” I shivered as the water hit me. He liked his showers too fucking hot. “You sure you’re alright?”

 

“Yes I’m just fine.” He turned to face me and not for the first time did I wish I was just a little bit taller. At least tall enough that I didn’t have to look up to meet his eyes. “Kenta . . . if you aren’t ready we don’t have to.”

 

I blinked a couple of times and looked down. Shit, wrong thing to do because now I was looking at his cock which wasn’t what I needed to be looking at right now. I swallowed trying to think of what to say and looked back up at him.

 

“I know you want too Ryuu but . . .”

 

“You are scared of hurting me?”

 

Nodding, I almost stepped back as he slowly ran the sponge over my chest leaving a trail of soap bubbles.

 

“That’s an easy fix. I’ll be on top.”

 

“Wha-“ He kissed me.

 

“Don’t say anything. Just trust me, okay.”

 

Seeing the look in his eyes I nodded. I did trust him. More than I’d ever trusted anyone since Ayame. He smiled at me, the soft grey eyes seeming to sparkle. Without saying anything else he slowly started to run the sponge over every inch of me. It was more relaxing than a turn on, but I enjoyed every second of it. I was more than happy to return the favor but he made me get out of the shower.

 

“Dry off and get in bed. I’ll be there in a bit.”

 

I was a little chilled as I slid under the covers, though the pricking sensation had nothing to do with the temperature. My heart seemed to skip slightly as I heard the shower shut off. It was several minutes later when the door to the bathroom opened again and I felt him get into bed. He slid up next to me, his skin still hot from the shower.

 

“Oh, you are nice and cool.” He kissed my shoulder and I could feel him smile. “You smell good too.”

 

I laid there not sure what to do or say and I heard him chuckle. Then he was straddling me, his chest against mine our lips touching. He kissed me lightly before pulling back and I felt his weight shift as he leaned over. The drawer of the night stand rattled open and I heard the unmistakable sound of him opening a condom.

 

“Ryuu . . . “

 

“Shh . . . you trust me right.”

 

“Yes.” It was barely a whisper, for some reason breathing was kind of difficult. Probably because he was still half laying on me. Yeah that was it. He kissed me again and slid down taking the covers with him. I kind of wanted them back. I bit my lip feeling his fingers wrap around me. He slowly stroked me until I was hard again, which didn’t take long at all. I was a little confused as I felt him slide the condom on me. Hadn’t he said he would be on top? I knew what that meant and it wasn’t this.

 

I didn’t have time to ask as he crawled back up, his knees on either side of my hips. His mouth found mine and thinking became next to impossible as he kissed me, his tongue slipping in deep. I couldn’t help but respond, the taste of him turning me on even more. I’d felt him moving slightly as he kissed me and there was a sudden pressure against the tip of my cock but I didn’t think anything of it since I could feel his fingers too. That was until something very, very tight and hot slid around the head. Ryuu moaned and broke the kiss, his whole body trembling. He grabbed my arms forcing me back down as I went to move.

 

“Just hold still . . . please.” He was a bit breathless.

 

“Ryuu . . . are you sure? Is this okay?”

 

“Shh . . . yes . . . yes this is much more than okay.” He shifted back and we both gasped, my head going back against the pillow as his fingers tightened on my arms. My entire length was inside him. Inside Ryuu. Oh fuck, this was really happening. It was so tight, the heat from his body almost more than I could take. He shifted slightly and it was like I could feel every little muscle move. I was shocked to realize I could feel his heart racing to match my own.

 

“Oh fuck.”

 

I opened my eyes at his soft laugh and looked up at him. He was smiling at me as he slowly started to rock his hips back and forth. I couldn’t stop the moan as the heat seemed to sear through me. He was so fucking tight it almost hurt as he moved and I grabbed his hips stopping him.

 

“Ryuu . . . it’s not . . . you aren’t hurting are you.”

 

He leaned down slightly to kiss me, the movement sending another rush of heat through me. “No, but you are a bit of a stretch.”

 

“Don’t fucking tease!”

 

He giggled and I sucked in a startled breath as muscles clench down even tighter. He slid forward enough that I thought he was going to get off of me, but just when I would have slipped out he was coming back down. Holy fucking shit that felt amazing. If I’d thought his mouth drove me crazy, I was going fucking insane now. I’d never in my life imagined I would find someone who made me feel so wanted, like I mattered more to him than anything else. It was overwhelming to know that he wanted to be with me like this. Just that he wanted me was more than I’d believed possible.

 

Ryuu

 

Gasping softly I kept my movements slow and shallow. It had been a long time since I’d bottomed, even from the top and the burn was making me a bit light headed. In a good way. Hearing the small sounds Kenta was making as I moved made it entirely worth it. His fingers tightened on my hips and suddenly he was meeting me as I came down. I’d been worried that the memories would interfere, but being on top helped.

 

“Oh god.” That was perfect. The angle, the way he filled me so completely, the feel of his fingers, just it being him, all of it amazed me and made me feel like nothing in my life ever had. Not even being on stage gave me this kind of feeling. I was making love to Kenta and that was what it truly felt like, even if it sounded cliché. To be truly connected to him in every way possible made my chest ache with something I’d never felt before. It was like all those stupid love songs finally made sense and I almost had to laugh at myself.

 

He was thrusting deeper each time, the sensation becoming so intense I knew I wasn’t going to last even without touching my erection. He seemed to have read my mind. The next thing I knew his hand was wrapped around me, slow smooth strokes making me whine. For someone who claimed to have never been with a man, he certainly knew what to do. I heard him make a low sound that was between a moan and a whine and suddenly his thrusts became a bit erratic. I was so close to going off myself and I didn’t want it to end this soon. I didn’t want this wonderful euphoria to ever stop.

 

“Oh shit! Ryuu!”

 

I shuddered, the feel of him coming sending a shock through me. Each pulse sent another dizzying spiral of heat through me until I was writhing. I came so hard it actually took my breath away, lights dancing before me.

 

“Kenta . . .” It took me a while to get my breath back and I realized I’d slumped forward, laying on him. His one hand was trapped between us. His other one lightly stroked my back. His breath warm on my skin as he spoke.

 

“You okay?”

 

“Much much better than that.” I turned my head so I could kiss him. He kissed me back, the passion in it like nothing before. I sighed into the kiss, feeling at once light and full of happiness and also so very sensitive, even the slightest movements making me want to gasp. He gently slipped his hand out from between us and taking hold of my hips shifted me forward. I bit my lip a small whimper escaping as he slid free. I shuddered at the sudden empty feeling. Then he was lifting me and laying me next to him. He kissed me softly but with such affection it brought tears to my eyes.

 

“Thank you Kenta.”

 

A low chuckle was his only response. He got out of the bed for a moment, probably to get rid of the condom. I was still tingling from the after affects when he came back and then he was kissing me again, pulling me closer. He wrapped his arms around me and I idly wondered if we should go take a shower first, but it felt too nice where I was. I’d just change the sheets in the morning. I was going to bask in this feeling as long as I could. I fell asleep completely wrapped up in the man I loved.

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Kenta

 

Slowly opening my eyes, I blinked a few times. It was bright in the room and I wondered what time it was. I had no idea what time I’d finally went to sleep. Laying awake next to Ryuu the full weight of what we’d done had finally hit me. Even this morning it gave me a jolt to realize it. Rolling over on to my side, I looked at the face that had become so familiar to me. Just looking at him caused this soft ache in my chest that I’d never felt before. Holy fuck, I was screwed in every sense of the word.

 

I’d never thought that I’d end up falling for him as hard as I had. Last night had just proved that when it came to Ryuu I still had a shit load to learn. I raised my head hearing his phone ring. That was the house phone, not his cell which meant it was either his mother or a business call. Slipping out of the bed, being careful not to wake him I trotted down the hall to the office and grabbed it up on the last ring.

 

“Ito residence Arakaki speaking.” I smirked, it had taken me two months to remember how to properly answer the phone. Ryuu had not liked my normal way of answering it.

 

“Kenta. You are there very early are you not?” I blinked a couple of times the smirk fading. Kaori sounded pissed which was highly unusual. Actually, I’d never heard her upset before.

 

“Uh . . . I stayed the night . . .” That now had a totally new meaning.

 

“Oh did you?” Fuck . . . did she know something? That tone was biting. “Do me a favor, boy and go turn the television on.”

 

I felt a soft pain go through me at her suddenly formal manner. What the fuck was going on? “Oh-okay any certain-“

 

“Just turn it on.”

 

Confused and oddly hurt I walked into the living room and finding the remote turned it to the first news station that came to mind.

 

“Just wait a few minutes. It’ll be on again.”

 

I almost asked what but thought better of it as I watched a report on some political candidate who was running for office again. The scene changed back to the news anchors and they went into the next news item.

“Ito Ryuunosuke, heir to CEO Ito Shiori’s UniCom wealth was spotted last night giving a rather personal thank you to his bodyguard backstage at club-“

 

“Oh fuck.”

 

“Quite right.” I flinched at her sharp tone and watched as several pictures of the two of us were displayed on the screen. It looked . . . bad. Like career ending bad.

 

“I –I better call Nakamara.” The manager probably already knew and would be calling. I glanced around wondering what had happened to my phone last night. It was probably back in the bedroom. Oh fuck. I gulped. “I-Ito-san, Ryuu doesn’t know . . . he’s still asleep.”

 

“He’ll have to get up and deal with this. This is a huge scandal. A huge scandal. His father is furious. I can’t believe you would seduce my son.” I realized with a start that she was crying now. Though I was pretty sure I was the one that got seduced, but no point arguing that. “I trusted you. How could you do this to him Kenta? Don’t you know what this is going to do to his reputation?”

 

“I . . . I’ll go get him up.”

 

“That would be good. Then I want you out of my apartment.”

 

My throat seemed to close up and I had to swallow several times before I could speak. “Hai, of course.”

 

I hung up. This couldn’t be happening. I looked back toward the bedroom. Ryuu was going to completely freak out and if I couldn’t be here . . . fuck.

 

Fuck.

 

Fuck.

 

Fuck.

 

Ryuu

 

I woke to find Kenta gently shaking me. I blinked a few times looking up at him and stretched wincing slightly. Was going to be a bit sore today. Not that I minded in the least. Smiling up at him I went to pull him down toward me only to have him jerk back.

 

“Ryuu . . . you really need to get out of bed.”

 

Brushing the hair out of my eyes I sat up. Something was completely off with him. He was already dressed. Why was he dressed? We didn’t have anywhere to go today. Why couldn’t he have stayed in bed and cuddled with me? My eyes traveled up the slender toned frame and I stopped startled as I met his eyes. There was a kind of pain there I’d never seen before. Pain and . . . desperation.

 

“Ryuu , there is a huge-huge fucking problem.”

 

I was scrambling out of the bed grabbing up clothes. Anything that could make Kenta panic was definitely cause for panic.

 

“What’s wrong? What happened?” He’d stepped back and was staring down at the floor. I could see the tension in his body, the way his fists were clenched at his side and it scared me. He was upset. Was it about last night? Oh no, no, no. I’d wanted it to be different with him. I didn’t want him to change like Naoki had.

“Kenta?”

 

“Your . . . mother called. There are pictures Ryuu . . . fucking pictures of you and me.”

 

“There are all kinds of pictures of me and you. You are in almost every candid shot of me.”

 

He shook his head, a violent movement. “No, from last night in the stairwell.”

 

I suddenly felt like the floor had dropped out from under me. Sinking down I sat on the edge of the bed. If he was this upset that only meant one thing. The press had got hold of the pictures. “Wait, Mother called?”

 

He nodded once. “She told me to turn the TV on. It’s all over the fucking news. I have to leave Ryuu. She doesn’t want me here.”

 

“No.” It came out instantly and much sharper than I’d intended. “You will not leave. This might be their apartment, but they haven’t lived here for years. I live here and if I want you here that is where you will be.”

Some of the tension left his shoulders, his hands slowly uncurling. He didn’t want to leave. He’d been upset at the thought of leaving. That knowledge made me giddy. This whole little fracas I could deal with. Him leaving? No. Getting up I walked over to him and gently took his face in my hands, pulling his head up.

“Besides how would it look if you were seen leaving my apartment very first thing in the morning?”

 

From the flicker of uncertainty across his eyes, I could tell he hadn’t thought of that. I laughed softly and kissed him. “This is nothing compared to some of the incidents I pulled in high school with Sora. No, this will be forgotten by tomorrow. Though . . . Kenta, I might have to say some things in an interview that will hurt you.”

 

He shook his head, his fingers coming up to grasp my wrists. “You can’t let anyone know about us . . . so lie your fucking ass off, I don’t care.”

 

I leaned forward kissing him again. “Thank you Kenta. For everything. For just being you.”

 

He blinked at me and something dark and unreadable simmered in his eyes for a long moment and then he was stepping back. “You better go get ready.”

 

I raised an eyebrow at him. “I am a rock star. I feel like keeping rock star hours.”

 

With that having been established I tackled him onto the bed. The world could wait. I had one reluctant bodyguard to drive crazy.

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Kenta

 

This was not even fucking funny. I’d finally managed to get out of the bed after Ryuu had literally tried everything from holding me down to pouting. It wasn’t going to work right now. I wasn’t about to let him ruin his career over something as fucking stupid as me. I was glad I’d thought to take a shower before I woke him up or I’d never have been able to get ready.

 

He was still pouting when I finished making breakfast. Curled up on the couch in front of the giant flat screen, he wouldn’t look at me. The news was on and I was getting sick of hearing the comments about the two of us. There was all kinds of speculation as to what was actually going on in the pictures. One woman saying that it looked like Ryuu was forcing himself on me. I almost snorted at that, as if he could. Sighing, I set the tray on the coffee table and grabbing the remote turned the TV off.

 

“Ryuu , we need to talk about this.”

 

He looked up at me and after a moment leaned forward and jerked the remote out of my hand. “I know how to handle this Kenta. I already talked to Nakamara. I was supposed to do a radio show tomorrow anyway, so we are just going to keep that scheduled. Honestly you are making too big a deal of it.

 

I stepped back pointing at the screen. “How fucking long do you think it will take before they find out who I am?”

 

“You are my bodyguard Kenta, everyone knows that.” The scornful look he tossed my way sent a chill through me, a cold weight settling in my gut. I’d seen that look so often in my life I’d thought I was immune to it, but apparently not from Ryuu. “It’s not that hard to find out who you are. Stop freaking out on me.”

 

“So fucking sorry if I don’t fucking like having my fucking picture all over the fucking news.”

 

“Kenta.” I was surprised at the sharp tone, his eyes more like granite than the soft grey I was used too. “Shut up.”

 

I blinked at him. Why didn’t he get how big a deal this was? I didn’t want to be the one responsible for ruining his career. I also really did not like having pictures of me making out with him being shown on the fucking news. Without saying anything else I turned on my heel, walking back into the kitchen to start cleaning it. I needed something to do with my hands, something to distract me from this whole fucking situation. Fuck him once and now he thinks he can just fucking act like . . . shit . . . he is my boss. Shit. Now I was mad at myself. What the fuck was I doing?

 

Throwing the pan into the sink I stared down at the soapy water. My brain was stuck on last night. I didn’t want it to be a onetime thing. I’d never thought sex could be that . . . satisfying. There had never been any meaning behind it before. Never been anything other than a quick fuck on both sides just for something to do. Both times come to think of it. I’d just done it because it seemed like what I was supposed to do. Neither girl had wanted anything to do with me once I got out of juvie though. Then again juvie had went and totally fucked with my head. Juvie didn’t count. Nothing that happened in juvie counted. Then joining the yakuza and working nights meant meeting girls got a lot fucking harder and if I was honest with myself I never fucking cared. Reiko was the only girl I’d ever met that I honestly liked and I wasn’t the least bit attracted to her.

 

I knew that meeting Ryuu was the best fucking thing that had ever happened to me. Even if it had never gone any further than him being my boss, this job had probably saved my life. Sighing, I slowly started cleaning the pan. Last night had been so good so why was it all going to shit now? I didn’t want to fight with him about this. It felt totally different than any other fights we’d been in and I didn’t like this odd feeling it gave me. This slightly lost, unsure feeling was not something I was used to. I should be used to him being pissed at me, so why did it hurt that he was being like this. It shouldn’t fucking hurt.

 

Taking a deep breath I realized it was me. I was the one pressing the issue. He wasn’t concerned in the least and I was freaking out. Hanging my head I gripped the counter. This relationship stuff was fucking hard. I wasn’t used to having anyone else to worry about, not like this. I jumped, startled as arms wrapped around my waist pulling me back flush against him. A chin rested on my shoulder.

 

“I’m sorry. You just don’t understand, Kenta. I’ve grown up being constantly watched and talked about. I can’t even go shopping without something being mentioned in the tabloids.” He paused and there was a soft sigh, his breath hot on my ear. “I didn’t mean to dismiss your feelings about it, though.”

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Ryuu

 

He slowly relaxed his knuckles no longer white as he gripped the countertop. I hadn’t thought about how this would affect him and it was unfair of me to expect him to just understand. He was used to being completely in the shadows and to suddenly be thrust into the limelight would no doubt be overwhelming for him. He was such a private person anyway. Hell, I didn’t even know where he lived and as far as I knew no one did.

He leaned back against me for a moment and I thought he was going to let me just hold him, but then he was turning away, grabbing up a towel. “Go get ready Ryuu. You’ve got shit to take care of.”

 

I sighed and let my arms drop to my sides. “Alright. Thank you for breakfast.”

 

I got a grunt in response. Narrowing my eyes I grabbed his wrist and started for the bedroom. He tried to yank away, but I just gripped him harder. He needed to relax and quit being so stressed out. He was not my bodyguard right now, he was my lover and I needed to remind him of that.

 

“Ryuu! What the fuck!”

 

“Make-up sex.”

 

“What?” He sounded almost panicked and I giggled. Now that was cute.

 

“We just had our first fight and now we are going to have make-up sex.”

 

“Ryuu! We don’t have time for that! Besides, that wasn’t the first time . . .”

 

I turned to him backing him up against the wall as we stood in the hallway. The dark eyes were wide as he looked at me. It wasn’t that often that I could catch him off guard like this. “It’s the first time since we became a couple. You are upset and I want to make you feel better.”

 

“Ain’t upset.” His eyes slid away from me as he said it. I took his face and turned his head so he had to look at me.

 

“Liar.” I kissed him feeling a slight tremble run through his body. Letting go of his head, I slid my fingers up under his shirt, never giving him a moment to protest. No matter how hard he tried I’d learned to see past the gruff exterior and I wasn’t about to let him get away with trying to shove me back out, not after last night. Never again would I be on the other side of that wall, even if I had to break it down.

 

By the time I had him back on the bed he was returning my kisses, though his eyes were still unsure. Even after last night he still seemed hesitant, but I didn’t mind taking charge. Getting his shirt off, I started kissing down his neck to his chest. He was so beautifully defined, the muscles taunt under the smooth skin. He twitched, jerking as I sucked on a nipple my teeth lightly grazing it. I loved how sensitive he was and the way he would make those low breathy sounds that were more erotic than a simple moan. Trailing my lips down the flat stomach, I quickly undid his pants getting a softly murmured protest.

 

Yanking the jeans down, I smirked up at him. He was already hard, his erection straining the fabric of his boxers. He’d raised his head off the bed so he could watch me, his eyes almost hidden behind the dark lashes. Pulling the boxers out of the way I immediately took him into my mouth, my hand wrapping around the shaft. The slightly spicy taste of him combined with the soft masculine smell was intoxicating and I wasn’t sure I could control myself. It was odd that I’d never felt this level of attraction before. This dizzying need to do whatever I could to get him screaming, to pleasure him in every way possible. Thinking about the dark look in his eyes as he’d yelled at me, knowing how upset he’d been seemed to heighten the searing desire to see that same level of arousal only in pleasure instead of anger.

 

Sucking, I swirled my tongue around the head and had to grab his hips to keep him from bucking. He was cussing up a storm his hands grasping at the sheets. Suddenly his fingers were in my hair and he was pulling my head back. I didn’t let up the suction even as he tried to pull me off.

 

“Ryuu . . . oh fuck stop Ryuu!”

 

I allowed him to move me back already missing the taste and feel of him. I raised an eyebrow at him as he sat up looking down at me. He was panting and flushed and absolutely gorgeous. I was not about to leave it at this. Was he trying to prove a point by stopping me?

 

“What’s wrong Ken-chan?” I put on my best innocent look, smiling at him and got a rather blank look in return. Crawling back up over him I forced him back down onto the bed. “Maybe that was a bit over stimulating?”

 

He frowned nodding and then just as quickly shook his head. He opened his mouth to say something and then shut it looking confused. I laughed, I couldn’t help it. He was just entirely too cute. Though I was a bit irritated that he wanted to stop, I was not about to. I glanced toward the nightstand. It was almost ten. Plenty of time. Keeping him pinned I grabbed the condom off the table along with the lube. I’d not used enough last night when I’d prepped myself and wasn’t going to make that mistake now.

 

“W-wait! Ryuu!”

 

Looking down at him I smiled. “Nope. Waited long enough.”

 

I smacked his hand away as he tried to keep me from putting the condom on him. “Fuck! Ryuu stop it! We don’t have time for-“

 

I kissed him, thrilled when his mouth opened automatically. I loved feeling that soft moan vibrate against my lips as I stroked his tongue with mine. After a long moment I slowly pulled back to look at him. “Do you want to be on top this time?”

 

He blinked at me a couple of times looking as if he wasn’t sure this was really happening. This was what I’d missed last night by having the lights off, all these wonderful expressions on the normally impassive face. When he hesitated I shrugged and shifting back slightly wiggled out of my sweats. The soft heat from his body made me bite my lip in anticipation.

 

“Ryuu . . .” His voice was soft almost supplicating. “Ryuu we shouldn’t-“

 

“Hush.” Taking his wrists I pulled his hands away from my hips where he’d been trying to stop me from moving onto him. Leaning down over him, I held his arms above his head and looked into those normally impenetrable black eyes. There was a kind of softness there as he looked back at me that made me catch my breath. “I want you Kenta. Even if we argue and are upset with each other I will always want you. Please let me love you.”

 

He closed his eyes and turned his head away and I thought for a moment I’d undone everything. “Kenta-“

 

I yelped, shocked as he suddenly twisted out of my grip and flipped me. Blinking rapidly as I suddenly found myself staring up at him I tried to catch my breath. Was he mad at me? No . . . the way he was looking at me . . . I’d never imagined I’d ever see that kind of vulnerability in his eyes, a kind of hopeless desperation. Then he was kissing me. If I’d thought his kisses were passionate last night, these sent me into dizzying heights that made me wonder if I’d ever recover.

 

“Why?” I almost missed the softly breathed word as he kissed my neck sending a rush through me.

 

“Because I love you Kenta.” I pulled his head up so I could look at him. What was he so afraid of? Why did he continue to try to resist? Because of the scandal? No, he’d been timid last night too. It was so at odds with what he was like normally and I wasn’t entirely sure how to deal with it. It made me feel like I really was forcing him into this. He slowly raised his eyes to look at me, but I wasn’t sure how to read the look in them.

Then he was kissing me again and I moaned feeling his hand grab me pumping with almost rough jerks. I cried out softly trying not to writhe. A knee spread my legs and I willingly moved lifting my hips toward him. I gasped as I felt fingers slide past my balls, stroking me. A slow gentle finger nudged in and I shuddered, a moan slipping free. How did he . . . why was he . . . I’d thought he didn’t know, any questions flew out of my head as a second finger then a third was added. They were slowly removed and he was kissing me again, his weight settling over me. I was trembling all over feeling utterly helpless and completely consumed. Strong hands lifted my hips slightly and then he was entering me.

 

His thrusts were slow, gentle and maddening. I brought my hips up to meet him, my back arching as I tried to force him deep, faster. I could hear myself whining, but I was powerless to stop. His movements sped up, the rhythm sending him deeper as my body adjusted.

 

“Oh shit . . . Ryuu . . .”

 

“N-not yet . . . oh god not yet!”

 

His soft moan was the only answer I got and then I felt it, the gentle pulsing sensation that seemed to reach my very core. I came with a weak cry, my hips thrusting spasmodically and I heard him gasp.

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Kenta

 

It was like all my fear, frustration and anger had been turned inside out and upside down. It was almost frightening how he could affect me. Somehow that had been even better than last night. I hadn’t thought that was fucking possible. Guess make-up sex was a good idea. I slumped down my arms shaking as I tried to hold myself up so that I wasn’t completely laying on him. He wrapped his arms around me pulling me down, kissed my cheek, my mouth, my neck in quick soft little kisses.

 

“Oh god Kenta you are amazing.” He drew back to look at me, the blue grey eyes searching my face. “You know . . . I think you lied to me.”

 

I tried to move back but he didn’t let me. It was impossible to meet his eyes. “ . . . ‘bout what?”

 

“You’ve done this before.”

 

I shook my head and met his eyes for a moment. “Nope.”

 

“Then how –“

 

“Ryuu . . . I was in juvie for over a year. Not the nice places you see on TV that they call correctional facilities.” Fuck . . . should I tell him? Would it change things if I did? He let me go so I could move back. I winced slightly as I slid free. Fuck that was tight. Sitting back on the bed I looked at him as he slowly sat up to lean against the headboard. Taking a deep breath I looked down and slid the condom off. “I learned a lot of things.”

 

Getting up I walked over to the trash can and tossed the condom in it. “My original sentence was only eight months, but I kept getting into fights because guys wanted to do to me what I just did to you, except a lot more violently. The last time I beat the fucker unconscious. They put me in solitary after that. Liked it better anyway.”

 

I finally turned to look at him. There was no expression on his face. None. It kind of freaked me out. He was probably regretting everything now. Turning away from the bed I started to look for my clothes. I staggered as his weight suddenly hit me, his arms wrapped tight around me.

 

“I’m so sorry, Kenta. If I’d known I would never-“

 

“Please don’t say it Ryuu . . .” I shifted around to look at him. “Don’t. You are not them.”

 

I sighed and brushed the hair back from his face. He was crying, silent tears running down his face. “Ryuu . . . please, if I didn’t want to be with you then none of this would have happened.”

 

He tried to smile, but there was too much pain behind it. “You’re sure?”

 

I nodded and leaning forward kissed him. “I’m sorry I got so upset this morning. It’s just too fucking weird seeing myself on the news.”

 

His smile eased into something more genuine. “You’ll get used to it.”

 

We both started hearing the doorbell and looked at each other. The panic in his eyes mirrored my own.

 

“Who the fuck is that?”

 

“I . . . I don’t know. No one was coming over today. Shit! We’ve got to get cleaned up and dressed too.” He was looking around wildly and I realized he was the one with cum all over him. Though he’d hugged me and . . . I looked down . . . well shit.

 

“I’ll go see who it is. Most people know I keep odd hours.” He was already grabbing his sweats and slipping them on. “No one knows you are here, so just stay in the bathroom for now, alright.”

 

I nodded and went to start the tub. He was back within a minute looking frantic. He grabbed a rag and after getting it wet quickly started cleaning himself off.

 

“Ryuu?”

 

“Yoshiru is here.”

 

“Yo-Yoshiru-oh fuck!”

 

Ryuu’s father. His father was here. Oh fucking hell.

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Ryuu

 

After jerking some clothes on and making sure Kenta was getting cleaned up I headed back into the living room. I felt nervous and jittery. It was the first time in almost four years that he’d visited me here at home. I’d seen him several times a year when I went to visit, but he rarely came to Japan any more. I knew why he was here. Mother had no doubt sent him to check up on me, especially considering what was going on in the news. I hoped that Nakamara had been able to get the gag order going. I probably should have called him when I got up this morning, but Kenta was kind of distracting. Why did real life have to hit right after such an amazing time with him? I wanted to just lay around and enjoy being with him until I had to get ready for the concert. But it seemed that I would have to wait for that. Maybe after the concert. There were a few things he and I needed to discuss anyway.

 

Yoshiru was sitting at the dining room table reading . . . oh fuck. Now I was starting to sound like Kenta, but seeing him reading one of the tabloids gave me an unsettled feeling. He looked up at me and smiled.

“Sorry about getting you out of bed son.”

 

I shook my head, running a hand through my hair hoping it didn’t look too disheveled. “Don’t worry about it. Um . . . I didn’t realize you were in Japan.”

 

“I just got in yesterday. We are buying out another company here in Kobe and your mother . . .” He sighed and folding the paper laid it on the table. He tapped the picture on the front. I glanced at it then away. It must be the latest issue. They had a more recent candid shot of me walking out of a club, Kenta behind me. It was cropped in such a way that you could barely tell that Sora was right next to me and Hasu was nearly hidden behind Kenta. It made it look like it was just Kenta and I, not the whole band like it had been. The headline was ridiculous and I knew I was going to be making a call to the editor of the paper personally. I looked back up as my father cleared his throat. “Ryuunosuke, this really is a bit much. Even for you.”

 

I looked down again trying to think of something to say, but my mind was completely blank. All I could think of was Kenta in the other room. Kenta was going to be beyond furious when he saw the tabloid. The unsettled feeling deepened into full blown anxiety.

 

“He’s here isn’t he.”

 

My head snapped back up as panic flooded me. “N-no. No he-“

 

He shook his head a disturbing grin on his face. “You’ve always been a terrible liar. You are too open with your feelings and it’s entirely too easy to see the fresh hickies with that shirt.”

 

My hand flew to my neck and he laughed at me, a soft sound that usually always put me at ease. After a moment he sighed and got up walking toward me. “Ryuunosuke, we do need to talk about this though. You know that I’ve always supported you in your decisions.”

 

I nodded, afraid to say anything.

 

“I understand that you think you like this . . . Arakaki?” He frowned slightly as he said it and I suddenly felt breathless, a weight settling over me. “I’m not sure this is smart. You should not be involved with an employee, son. It can create all kinds of problems.”

 

“I . . . I . . . need him.” I felt like a complete idiot, was that really the best I could come up with?

 

“Yes, I know you think you do. I don’t need to remind you what happened last time . . .” I had to look away unable to take the pain in his eyes. I’d been furious when Sora had told my parents what Naoki had done. I hadn’t pressed charges at the time and they had both been livid, threatening to move me to Europe with them. It was only after I’d promised to put a restraining order on Naoki that they had backed off. They had both readily agreed that my having a bodyguard was a good idea. Though it seemed now maybe they were regretting that. “No, I can see that I don’t. I’m sorry for bringing it up. But, you understand how worried I am.”

 

I nodded slowly trying to find my voice. “Kenta . . . Kenta is nothing like him. He-he wouldn’t even touch me if I didn’t want him to. He’s been my bodyguard for two years now and I trust him more than I’ve ever trusted anyone.”

 

“Well . . . that’s good.” His eyes seemed to soften as he looked at me. He stepped close and pulled me into a quick hug. “You’ve grown, in a lot of ways, son. I’m very proud of you. Now where is he?”

 

I stood there shocked once he let me go. He was proud of me? Even with all the shit I’d pulled and this latest issue, though it wasn’t like I’d planned it, he was still proud of me? Numb I watched as he walked passed me toward the bedroom. Then it suddenly hit me. Kenta was probably in the tub and the room was a mess our clothes strewn everywhere and I’d not had a chance to tell Kenta to watch his language but it looked like none of that was going to matter.

 

“Wa-wait! Dad!”

 

I ran after him but he was already in the bedroom. He glanced around and headed straight for the bath room pushing the door open.

“Fucking hell!”

 

I cringed, covering my face with a hand. Kenta was standing in front the sink only a towel wrapped around his waist. He looked surprised and . . . pissed.

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Kenta

 

I glanced around but it wasn’t like there was anywhere I could go. Yoshiru looked a hell of a lot like Ryuu, except with dark hair and more worry lines. Seeing him standing there in his suit and tie looking like a business tycoon reminded me all over again just how fucking stupid I probably looked. Nothing like getting caught half naked by your lover’s father, guess it was better than getting caught in bed. He raised an eyebrow at me and looked back toward where Ryuu was quietly freaking out behind him.

 

“You shouldn’t try to lie to me Ryuunosuke.” I stepped back as he walked toward me. Oh fucking hell this could not be good. He stopped a few feet from me and looked down at me. “So, you are the bodyguard. Shouldn’t you be taller?”

 

I blinked at him, confused. He chuckled, the smile erasing the worry lines, and then stepped back. “Get pants on, then come to the living room. There are some things we need to discuss.”

Oh hell . . . that couldn’t be good. I looked past him to Ryuu, but he’d turned around and had his head down.

 

Fuck. Yoshiru was already leaving the room and I watched as he grabbed Ryuu’s arm pulling him out of the bedroom. Finding clean clothes I pulled them on, trying to hurry but it didn’t seem to be working. Why did this have the same feel as when I had to go to Jiro about something I really didn’t want to? Hopefully he wasn’t as violent as Jiro.

 

I pulled my hair back into a short pony tail since I hadn’t had a chance to wash it. Him and Ryuu were sitting on the couch when I came in. Things seemed . . . okay? Nobody was yelling or seemed upset and Ryuu wasn’t crying or anything. Maybe that was a good sign.

 

“That is a good look for you.” Yoshiru smiled. “I like your hair like that, can see more of that handsome face.”

 

Somebody needed to pick my jaw up off the floor. Was he fucking serious? I quickly shut my mouth as he started talking again.

 

“Anyway, there are some rather serious things we need to talk about today. Hush son.” He patted Ryuu’s leg but it didn’t stop the pout from forming. “Arkaki-san, why don’t you take a seat. I know you both have a busy day ahead of you, but this must be taken care of.”

 

I took the seat next to the couch that Sora normally hogged. Ryuu narrowed his eyes at me and looked away. Like I was going to fucking sit next to him with his father right there. Was he fucking nuts? It was enough that the man seemed to know exactly what was going on.

 

I jumped as a file plopped down on the coffee table. “Arakaki-san, this is your background check, the one I had run on you when Ryuu first mentioned hiring you.”

 

I stared at him. They’d run a background check on me? Why the FUCK had they hired me then?

 

“I can see why Ryuu insisted we hire you. Your experience makes you uniquely qualified.”

 

“Huh?”

 

Yoshiru cocked his head at me and sat back crossing an ankle over his knee. “Kenta . . . may I call you Kenta? Yes, thank you. I know this might come as a bit of a shock to you, but after reading all the reports from both the lawyer and the correctional facility plus the warden’s comments I knew that you had a very protective nature. If you could put up with my son’s . . . quirks, then I had no issue with you being hired. However, it seems that things have progressed quite a bit further than a simple employer-employee relationship.”

 

Suddenly the carpet was very, very interesting. Fuck. I didn’t bother to look up as he went on. “I’m not going to fire you Kenta. I know Nakamara insisted I do so last month when you were unavailable for so long, but I understand that things happen. Besides that, you’ve proved you are trustworthy and capable if a bit vulgar. Now I know Kaori is upset, but . . . it’s mostly due to the bad press. Ryuunosuke you know how badly it upsets her to see you in the news like that.”

 

I glanced over at Ryuu, he had his head down and I saw him nod once. Yoshiru went on. “You will need to call her and apologize for upsetting her.”

 

“Not like I’m the one who took the pictures.”

 

“No, but you were not thinking about the fact that what you do is considered public domain. Even your most private moments are up for scrutiny. Especially if you are somewhere that someone can see you.” Yoshiru sighed. “Kenta, you are going to need to be even more careful. Ryuunosuke is used to the press hounding him, but you . . . I’m sorry to say it but you will be getting harassed like never before.”

 

I swallowed, that did not sound good. It sounded fucking horrible. Yoshiru took a deep breath and blew it out forcefully as if he was glad that was overwith.

 

“Now, what time is the concert?”

 

“Nine.”

 

“Okay, that gives me plenty of time.”

 

“For what?” Ryuu was looking at his father, clearly puzzled. So was I.

 

Yoshiru looked at me and his smile fucking creeped me out. “Kenta and I need to run an errand.”

 

“Wha-“ Before I could say anything else Yoshiru was on his feet and walking over to me. He reached down and pulled me to my feet.

 

“Ryuunosuke, we will be back in about an hour. Don’t bother calling him, he won’t be available.”

 

“But wait! Wait! Dad! Where are you taking him?” Ryuu sounded panicked.

 

“Just get ready to go Ryuu and clean up your room. Seriously, you are a grown man.”

 

I managed to slide my shoes on and then I was getting hauled out of the apartment.

 

“I-Ito-san-“

 

“I’m sorry Kenta, but this has to be done. I know you have no family so think of me as your father. I’m just wanting to make sure that my son is happy and that means making sure that you are well taken care of.”

 

Okay . . . the man wasn’t making any fucking sense. I kept my mouth shut as we got into the black car that was waiting outside the entrance. He immediately had a phone call once we got inside and I ended up just looking out the window. What the fucking hell was going on? I’d expected to get yelled and screamed at, told to leave and never come back anything but this . . . acceptance. Why wasn’t he more upset about the tabloids? Shouldn’t he be firing me and telling me I was never to see Ryuu again? Oh god . . . just the thought had my heart racing painfully, a weird tight feeling in my chest. That had never happened before and it kind of freaked me out. If just thinking about losing Ryuu made me feel that panicked . . .

 

“We are here Kenta.” Yoshiru’s soft voice snapped me out of my thoughts. I looked over at him and then past him to the building. A clinic? What the fuck?

 

He got out first and I hesitated to follow. Why the hell were we at a clinic? His smile didn’t help calm me down at all.

 

“I’ve already arranged for all the necessary exams.”

 

“What?” Exam? What exams?

 

Somehow we were already inside. When had that happened? I glanced around the waiting room as he spoke with the receptionist. It was like any other waiting room but I felt entirely too nervous. Before I had a chance to try and slip out there was a nurse smiling at me as she lead me back to an exam room. Yoshiru walked in behind her.

 

“I’ll be just outside the door if you need anything.”

 

I nodded, not knowing what else to do. I slowly got undressed as the nurse had instructed and putting on a soft hospital yukata sat on the table and waited. I tried not to think about why I was here or what exams Yoshiru had asked for. Hopefully it wasn’t as bad as what Ryuu had done to me when I’d had those busted ribs. Still needed to beat his ass for that. The nurse came back in and did all the usual stuff. It was when the doctor came in that things got fucking weird.

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Ryuu

 

I closed my phone for what felt like the hundredth time. I’d already taken a nice hot bath and gotten dressed for the concert and still they weren’t back. What was Yoshiru up to, taking off with Kenta like that. Looking at the food I’d ordered well over an hour ago, I blew out a frustrated breath. I was too nervous to eat. I jumped up out of the chair hearing the front door open.

 

“We’re back.” Yoshiru grinned widely at me as I tried to peer around him to where Kenta was. Kenta looked positively dejected, not even looking up from the floor, the normally square shoulders slumped. What had happened while they were gone?

 

“Ryuunosuke, can I talk to you in the office for a moment?” I nodded shocked to hear him speak in English.

 

I shut the door behind us and turned to face him. “What is going on?”

 

“English please.”

 

“Why? What does it matter?”

 

“Because I want to keep this conversation private.”

 

I sighed, rolling my eyes. Sora and I did this all the time when we didn’t want people to know what we were talking about. “Fine. What is going on?”

 

“Kenta is malnourished.”

 

“What!” I couldn’t help the gasp.

 

“I just had him at a private clinic to make sure he is clean and free of any STDs and while they were checking that I had them run a few other tests as well. He is low on almost everything.”

 

“Wait . . . you had him checked for sexually transmitted diseases?” I was aghast that my father would go so far.

 

“Of course. You two are intimate and I don’t want you contracting something.”

 

“Yoshiru you can’t just take my boyfriend and make him take those kinds of tests.” No wonder Kenta had looked so depressed.

 

“Think of it as a condition of his employment. He is perfectly clean and physically sound. My only concern is the malnutrition. The doctor said he was surprised that Kenta wasn’t sick more often. He needs more fruit and vegetables in his diet. I expect you to make sure he’s getting them.”

 

Staring at my father I slowly shook my head. “You realize that he already was tested for stds, right?”

 

Yoshiru raised an eyebrow at me. “When you had him in for the broken ribs? They only tested for the most common. I had him tested for everything.”

 

“E-everything?”

 

“Yes and now that that little issue is cleared up I can confidently tell your mother that gay sex is not going to kill you.” I suddenly felt light headed. “Though she is rather disappointed that she won’t be getting any grandchildren.”

 

“I-I better go check on Kenta. He hates doctors.”

 

“Mm yes. I could hear him cussing the doctor all the way out in the waiting room. It was quite amusing.”

 

I didn’t even know what to say to that. Heading out of the office I spotted Kenta in the kitchen. He was leaning against the counter his chin resting on his chest, his arms folded. It was a common posture to find him in when he was upset and thinking about something. I stood there for a moment wondering if he would notice me. Finally I walked up to him, lightly touching his shoulder. He didn’t move.

 

“Hey . . . dad says the tests all came back clean-“

 

“Don’t give a shit. Ain’t been with nobody in four fucking years, could have told him if he’d fucking asked.” It was kind of cute to see him pouting and I couldn’t help but gather him up into my arms. It was still a shock when he didn’t push me away. He must be pretty upset, it made me feel bad.

 

“Hey it wasn’t that bad was it? At least now you know for sure right?”

 

“They stuck a fucking swab up my cock, you how fucking bad that hurts?”

 

“Yes I’ve had it done, Kenta. It is uncomfortable but necessary.”

 

“Fuck that. You’re the only guy I’ve ever been with and we used a condom both times.” He was getting more upset, his hands coming up to try and push me away.

 

“Shh, it’s fine, it’s over now. I know I’m clean so as long as we are faithful to each other we won’t have to do that again. Right?” That seemed to calm him down, he quit trying to push me away and I heard him sigh, the muscled chest rising and falling slowly against me. I ran my fingers through the loose hair at the base of his neck then tugged the pony tail gently. “Dad is right, this is a good look for you.”

 

“Don’t fucking tease.”

 

There was a soft laugh from behind me and I felt Kenta jerk, but didn’t let him go.

 

“I’ll see you two later. Kenta, take good care of my son.” There was a soft ‘fuck you’ breathed into my shirt and I yanked his pony tail. “Ryuunosuke, don’t forget to call your mother.”

 

“Hai! I won’t! Bye Dad.”

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Ryuu

 

“God damn it Ryuu! Why didn’t you watch where you were?”

 

“I’m sorry.” I winced putting a hand to my head. I still felt dizzy, my head pounding. Kenta’s arms tightened around me and I could feel him shaking slightly with the strain of carrying me. “Put me down, I can walk.”

 

“No.” It was a low growl.

 

I struggled weakly in his grip. “Put me down! I have to finish the concert.”

 

“No, Nakamara already announced it was over. You were on the encore anyway.”

 

“Ryuu! Kenta! Is he alright?”

 

“I’m fine.”

 

“Are you sure?”

 

I looked up to see Sora peering down at us. His spikes were starting to wilt from the humidity and he looked flushed. I could hear Hasu and Akira but couldn’t see them.

 

“I’m sure. Kenta is just being overprotective.” I yelped as fingers pinched my arm. “Kenta! That hurt!”

 

“You are not fine. You collapsed on stage.”

 

“I just got dizzy all the sudden. That’s all.”

 

“Ryuu, you were passed out cold when I picked you up.”

 

I looked at Kenta, meeting the dark eyes for a moment. “Really?”

 

He rolled his eyes. “You think I’d be carrying your ass around otherwise?”

 

I was surprised to see Hiro’s giant bulk towering outside the dressing room door. He winked at me as he opened the door.

 

“Ito-sama. Kenta.”

 

“Thanks Hiro.” Kenta edged through the door and finally let me down. He glared up at me for a moment before turning back to the door. He moved to the side as Sora, Hasu and Akira walked in. Everyone looked sweaty and tired. Hasu came up to me and put a hand on my arm, his large dark eyes peering up at me.

 

“Ryuu . . . are you sure you’re alright.”

 

“I feel better now, the dizziness seems to be fading but my head hurts.”

 

“Well . . . you probably hit it when you fell.”

 

“I . . . yeah I guess.”

 

There were suddenly hands in my hair and I winced as fingers found the knot. “Ow! Stop it!”

 

I swatted the hand away and looked up to see Kenta glaring down at me. “Why did you get dizzy in the first place?”

 

I looked at him for a long moment but finally had to break the intense gaze. “I-I’m not sure. I felt fine earlier.”

 

“Ryuu . . . you need to tell him.” I didn’t look up at Hasu. “Ryuu it could be important.”

 

“Tell me what.”

 

My chin was suddenly grabbed and I found myself staring into deep pools of obsidian. I blinked a couple of times but the fingers tightened when I tried to pull away.

 

“What did you do Ryuu?”

 

“I . . . I . . . took a water bottle from one of the fans.”

 

“What!” I fell back against the couch as Kenta shoved me. “What the fuck were you thinking Ryuu? Are you that fucking stupid?”

 

The sudden stabbing pain in my chest rendered me speechless. I looked down at the matted beige carpet. I knew it was stupid, but I’d been caught up in the excitement. I’d only taken one quick drink of it before leaving it on the stage. I couldn’t remember now if it had already been opened or not. Leaning forward I ran a trembling hand over my face.

 

“Kenta I-“

 

“Shut the fuck up.” Kenta snapped making me flinch, a soft gasp escaping. “I’ll be back later.”

 

The sound of the door slamming made me jump. It seemed to break whatever control I’d had. Slumping over on the couch I buried my face in the cushions.

 

***

 

“He still hasn’t moved.”

 

“Do you think he passed out again?”

 

“No.”

 

I could hear everyone’s hushed voices. It was annoying. I had no idea how long I’d been laying there trying to avoid thinking about anything. Why was I so stupid? Even Reiko had came in and yelled at me.

 

“They found it. One of the stage hands had it. He set it to the side since it was different from the usual bottles. Reiko is taking to have it tested now.” I raised my head slightly hearing Isao’s voice. They’d called him too? Fuck. I went to push myself up off the couch and realized I couldn’t. What was going on? There was a rush of dizziness and suddenly I was on my back looking up at the ceiling.

 

“Ryuu! Are you alright?”

 

I blinked a few times trying to get things to focus. Sora and Hasu were hovering over me and I heard someone yelling for Kenta.

 

“Call an ambulance! He’s not responding.”

 

What were they talking about? I could hear and see them just fine. I reached up to touch Hasu who had tears in his eyes. Nothing happened. My arm didn’t move. In fact nothing was moving. I knew I was still breathing and I could feel my heart racing, but other than that it was like I was asleep and dreaming. Kenta suddenly appeared behind Hasu, his face completely blank. Just once couldn’t he pretend to be concerned, just let the mask slip a little.

 

“Hiro is calling the ambulance. What happened? He was fine when I left.”

 

“I don’t know.” Hasu looked at me, tears streaming down his cheeks. “He was just laying there. I thought he was mad and just not talking. Oh Ryuu! I’m sorry.”

 

He was sorry? What was he sorry for?

 

“Kenta! I found the girl! The one who gave him the drink.”

 

Kenta got up and I had a fleeting glimpse of that toned rear before he was gone. I wanted to smash my head into something solid. Why had I been so stupid? Now everyone was upset and worried. Hasu was crying softly beside me while Sora stroked his hair. It was only a few moments later when Kenta reappeared.

 

“Stupid bitch. It was ruffies. I already called security. The police are going to pick her up. Are you sure he only drank a little of it. Where is the bottle? Call Reiko now!”

 

There was a slight commotion and I heard someone exclaim. “I just got a hold of her. Half the bottle is gone.”

 

No, there was no way I drank that much of it. Was there?

 

“Half the fucking bottle? Shit! Ryuu.” Kenta was looking down at me now and I could see the mask starting to slip, it didn’t give me any satisfaction to see the worry in his eyes. I wanted so badly to pull him against me and hold him, to make this odd chilled sensation go away. I blinked and it seemed like everyone disappeared only to be replaced by medics. I was placed on a gurney and strapped down, the panic seemed to subside a bit, replaced by nausea. As we headed into the hallway I could hear raised voices.

 

“If you’d been doing your fucking job, this wouldn’t have happened! Didn’t you see him get handed the bottle? How did she get close enough to do that anyway?” I would recognize Nakamara’s voice anywhere, but who was he yelling at? As our manager I’d heard him yell a lot but usually not at the staff.

 

“I was standing where I always do. I didn’t see anyone get close enough . . .“

 

Kenta! He was yelling at Kenta? I’d never heard Kenta sound like that. He sounded so . . . distressed, a slight tremor to his voice that sent a stab of pain through me.

 

“You’re too fucking short. Next time Hayate and Hiro will take the stage, you just stay backstage and out of the fucking way. You aren’t good for anything but keeping the idiot happy.”

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Kenta

 

Once again I found myself standing around like a fucking idiot while everyone else rushed around panicked. Why was it that when it came to Ryuu I seemed to fucking fail more often than not? I turned in time to see them loading him up into the ambulance. I grabbed my head as someone smacked me from behind.

 

“Oi! I’ll fucking-oh . . . Sora . . .”

 

“What the hell are you doing Arakaki? Shouldn’t you be with him?”

 

I glanced up at Sora and looking back down shook my head. “I have to stay here and help.”

 

“Fuck that, we’ve got it. Get going before I smack you again.”

 

He did anyway. I would have kicked him but he was already too far away. Damn him and his fucking long legs, he moved too fast and I wasn’t in the mood to start a fight. Yeah I know, me not want to fight, fucking weird. This whole thing had rattled me a lot more than I wanted to admit. It didn’t help getting fucking ripped to shreds by Nakamara too. He’d wanted to hit me. I could see it in the way he looked at me, the tension in his shoulders.

 

Heading for my bike I wondered why Ryuu had taken the water. I knew he sometimes didn’t think before he did things, but this really was stupid. Straddling the bike, I thumbed the switch and after checking traffic headed for the nearest hospital. I couldn’t stop thinking about what had happened. It would have been better to hurt a fan’s feelings than to let himself get drugged. What if it had been poison? I jerked the bike back into my lane as a horn blared, my heart suddenly pounding making me feel a bit light headed. I really shouldn’t be thinking about this right now. Traffic was too heavy for me to be distracted. That’s what Ryuu was, one giant fucking distraction.

 

 

They kept him until the report came back on what was in the water. At least the girl hadn’t lied about what she’d put in it. I hoped the police were giving her hell right now. I’d been a lot less nice than what they probably would have. Like I fucking cared if she’d shit her pants she was so scared. Stupid bitch deserved to be beat. And here was the other person who needed beat for their sheer stupidity. I shook my head seeing Ryuu coming down the hall. He looked pale, the gray eyes washed out. It sent a pang of . . . something through me and all my irritation evaporated like water on a hot griddle. He was wearing normal street clothes for once, just a t-shirt and jeans. His hair was loose and floating around his head and shoulders as he walked. Holy fuck he looked hot.

 

“Ryuu-“

 

“Oh Kenta, I’m so sorry.” Next thing I knew I had a silly blond singer crying into my shoulder. I glanced around but didn’t see anyone else. Where was the rest of the band, Reiko, Isao any of them?

 

“Hush Ryuu, it’s alright. You didn’t know. Where is everyone?”

 

He shrugged and finally lifted his head. “I told them I didn’t want visitors.”

 

“Ryuu . . . everyone was so fuc-“ He kissed me and I jerked back startled. “Ryuu! Not here!” I hissed at him and cringed seeing the expression on his face. Grabbing his arm I turned. “Come on.”

 

Thankfully, I’d thought to bring my guest helmet. Ryuu needed some space, to get away from everyone and everything for a bit or he was going to end up too depressed over the whole situation. Sliding onto the bike I tossed him the other helmet. I put mine on and tightened the chin strap. He was still standing there looking down at the helmet in his hands.

 

“What are you waiting for? Put the helmet on and get on. You can ride behind me.”

 

“Are . . . are you sure? I can just call-“

 

“Get the fuck on Ito.”

 

He nodded and put the helmet on. I sat the bike up and kicked back the stand and looked over at him. He looked nervous, his eyes peering at me from within the helmet. He didn’t say anything and got on behind me. It gave me a little rush to feel him put his hands on my hips. The bike started easily and settled into a low purr.

 

“Hang on to me.”

 

His fingers tightened as we took off and I think I heard him call my name, but the wind ripped away any sounds. I knew where I wanted to go. It was a bit of a drive, but it would be worth it and I had plenty of gas. After a while I felt him relax and lean against me more, his arms around my waist. His helmet would bump mine every so often as the wind buffeted us. The soft heat from his body was soothing and I felt my own anxiety from earlier finally ebbing away.

 

We finally reached the beach and I slowed the bike, pulling off the road. We both sat back and I took my helmet off. The roar of the surf was much louder than the bike had been, but had the same type of calming affect too it.

 

“Why are we here?” Ryuu’s voice was soft in my ear.

 

“You needed some space.” I shifted slightly on the seat so I could turn to look at him. “Ryuu . . . why did you take the bottle from her?”

 

The pale eyes lowered. “I . . . I’m not sure. I was just caught up in the moment and wasn’t thinking. I’m sorry Kenta. Nakamara shouldn’t have yelled at you like that.”

 

“Wait . . . you heard that?”

 

He nodded, his hair tickling my neck as he leaned forward, his arms wrapping around my chest. “It was horrible, Kenta. I could hear and see everything, but I couldn’t move or speak. I haven’t been that terrified in . . . a long time.”

 

I could hear the fear in his voice and it tore at me. “It’s over now. Just please, please be more careful Ryuu. You have no idea how badly you scared everyone.”

 

Soft lips grazed my neck, then my jaw making me shiver. “I know. I’m sorry.”

 

“I am too Ryuu. I . . . should have spotted her sooner and this would never have happened.”

 

I felt his lips pull up into a grin. “There is that . . . maybe I should make you make it up to me.”

 

“Ryuu . . . don’t push it.”

 

“No, no you are right. I wouldn’t have taken it from her if she hadn’t got past the barrier. I thought she was supposed to be there.”

 

“What?” I turned to look at him. He nodded, his eyes somber. I frowned not sure if I should believe him or not.

 

“You know how sometimes when we run out of water Hayate or you will send someone along the front of the stage with more. I thought she was one of those people.”

 

“Oh shit . . . I’m sorry Ryuu.” If that was the case we were going to have to be a lot more careful. “Tell you what . . . I’ll make it up to you tonight. I’ll make you dinner.”

 

He grinned and I suddenly realized I’d been tricked into something. “I have a better idea.”

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