Jump to content

"Revenge" (Just wrote this today)


Amander123
 Share

Recommended Posts

Okay, another darker poem. Tell me what you think! I literally just finished this like 30 seconds ago lol :)

 

 

 

"Revenge"

 

These hands stained with blood

Quiver in the dark night

With no home to go back to

I hide myself from the light

 

My vision is blurred

And tears mix with blood

My clothing is torn

My face tarnished with mud

 

Eyes burning with fire

A soul cursed by the devil

I have achieved my revenge

And it's now time to revel

 

The filth of the world

Must be demolished by hand

People are too weak

And are unable to withstand

 

I lick my blade clean

Knowing what I have done

As demented as I am

I still found this all fun

 

Your body now lays there

Covered in liquid fire

I've always known the truth

You were nothing but a liar

 

A smile escapes my lips

As I toss your corpse a rose

I bid you a goodnight

As this case comes to a close

  • Like 9
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Replies 7
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

  • Amander123

    3

  • Ueda_Angel

    1

  • TricksXia

    1

  • lilredphoenix

    1

Top Posters In This Topic

I rest my case you are more talented them me. I could never write that well and NO ARGUING ABOUT IT!

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ahah, SO cool *.*

I found myself grinning like mad throughout it all. I could totally see myself as the psychotic poetic subject :msn_red_fox 9

The highlight for me is from the 3rd strophe onward:

 

I lick my blade clean

Knowing what I have done

As demented as I am

I still found this all fun

 

Your body now lays there

Covered in liquid fire

I've always known the truth

You were nothing but a liar

 

A smile escapes my lips

As I toss your corpse a rose

I bid you a goodnight

As this case comes to a close

 

Thank you, it was a great read, Amanda. Bloody amusing, literally ♥

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

@Ueda_Angel

 

I still think you are way better than me!! :)

 

@Jenova

 

I'm glad you liked it!!! :D I had a feeling you would enjoy those lines at the end :msn_red_fox 9

 

But thank you very much!

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

A smile escapes my lips

As I toss your corpse a rose

I bid you a goodnight

As this case comes to a close[/color]

 

. .this was the final blow i really really liked, rabbit14

 

. .what more could i say, amander-sama, no ordinary words can express when i always read your poems, :hamtaro-005 (19):

 

. .it's just that, i TOTALLY APPRECIATED every work you made

 

 

 

. .btw, i'm still working on a poem (dedicated for my mom) amander-sama, it was also kinda dark, it's been 2 days and i haven't finished it, i'm still finding for right words that could detail my mom, (as a poet of dark poems, please, express everything that you'll feel while reading it), i'll do my best to finish it till night :)

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

@Cloudy-chan

 

Thank you so much! I'm so happy that you like my poems so much :3onion15:

I look forward to reading yours soon and I will definitely tell you what I think about it :D

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 1 month later...

WOW! Amander the words seem to flow from your pen and are very descriptive with power and emotions behind it. Hope continue to share your work with us all here.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
 Share




×
×
  • Create New...

YaoiOtaku is a friendly community that has a lot to offer when it comes to everything yaoi - manga series, DJs, oneshots, anime, yaoi RPs and plenty of BL discussion topics.

Make sure to also check:

Yaoi Manga

KPop Profiles

Yaoi Dj

Manga Lotus