Help me find this high school manga with a sadistic seme!

[solveig_f]

I’m looking for this High School BL manga (japanese author) that I’ve read a long time ago and don’t remember the title.

points I know/remember:

・It’s been published at least 5years ago, give or take. 
・I read what was  probably english fan translation
・its a high school setting with (i think) light haired seme and (i think) dark haired uke

・the seme is pretty sadistic by nature with kind of sociopathic tendencies. I vividly remember his childhood flashback of him talking about how he’s unsure himself why he’s so cruel and uncaring, while ripping off teddy bear’s ear. If there’s no such scene, that’s not the manga i’m looking for…
・no omegaverse/sub dom, the manga is too old for the trend

・i think the relationship started with some sort of (at Least attempted) assault on the uke from the seme (good ol’ yaoi formula…)

・the manga style and plot has overall a pretty gloomy vibe with some psychological subtext. it’s mostly about how fucked up seme is in the head but  in a kind of in realistic light, how it affects his relationships and of course, sex preferences, and how jealous and possessive he gets. Its them figuring out their fucked up relationship. Uke was going through a lot with the bastard smh. 
・I think the seme was quite a playboy before they met and i remember the uke not being a typical damsel and was pretty snarky most of the time.

I tend to hyper-fixate so if anyone has a clue let me know i’ll wait forever, please and thank you

Edited August 17, 2023 by solveig_f

[solveig_f]

Oh wow I found it myself!

 

Kizudarake no Hakoniwa

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It’s not as dark as I remember or as retrospective but it was still an enjoyable reread